"They struck me, but I did not become ill; They beat me, but I did not know it. When shall I awake? I will seek another drink."  Proverbs 23:35

The life and times of the drunken fool comes to an end with this last verse.  Yet this last verse as much as any of the others describes perfectly what alcohol can do to someone.  It makes them a fool.  The problem is that they do not know it - nor do they really care.  Their life is spent going from one drunken episode to another - or as we see in today's world - they live from one party to the next.  They are unaware of the real damage that is being done to their lives - and even when it is evident it is worn more as a badge of honor than as what it is - the marks left on a fool in the midst of his pursuit of more and more sensuality.  When this drunken episode and party is over - his thought when he awakens is the next party, the next time he can drink, the next time he can act the fool.

This last verse is the drunken fool speaking to himself.  He is remembering some of his most recent party experiences.  He remembers that someone hit him - but the inebriated deadening of his senses did not remember it.  His thought is that he was not badly injured - or at least not injured enough to be incapacitated.  That is the idea behind the word "ill" here.  It speaks of being ill enough to be weak or incapcitated.  It speaks only of a severe wounding.  Since this drunken fool was not so badly injured that he was laid up for days - he doesn't even consider the fact that he was struck. 

Even worse he repeats this again when he says, "They beat me, but I did not know it."  The first statement was a single blow received from someone.  This second statement speaks of being beaten with multiple blows.  His answer to this is that he did not even know he was being beaten.  I've actually met people who were beaten badly - but did not realize it until someone else told them the next day when they were questioned as to why they had bruises on their body.  What is truly sad is that they laughed about the situation, finding it funny that they were in a serious fight and didn't even know it.  At this point I must also mention another sin of the drunken fool - and that is that some of them beat others.  What I refer to is those drunken fools who beat their wives and their children.  Some of them do not even remember the pain their inflicted on their loved ones while in the midst of their drunken stupor.  The point here is that these fools are so drunk that they do not know what is happening during their beatings. 

The last statement here is the worst of all.  "When shall I awake?  I will seek another drink."  As the drunken fool falls asleep after his binge - he knows that he will wake up eventually.  Does he awaken to seriously consider what he as done - the damage that is in the wake of his indulgent lifestyle?  He does not.  In fact, most alcoholics will blame everyone else for their choices and the havoc that follows in their wake.  Their thought when they awaken is getting another drink.  The literal statement here is this, "I will yet again drink."  His thoughts are dominated by the next party, the next binge, the next over-indulgence, his next drunk.  His life has become his drunkenness - and his desire to drown his miserable life in another bout of partying. 

I know that some of you who read this may be thinking that I am too hard on the drunken fool.  In fact you are pretty offended that I use that term to describe this man or woman.  You prefer calling them an alcoholic - referring to their situation as a social disease rather than a series of foolish choices.  You almost cringe at the strong statements that have been made in this post.  God desires to deliver the drunken fool - and He loves him as He does any other sinner.  But God makes it clear here and elsewhere that drunkenness is not funny, neither is it something we should treat lightly.  God would not spend seven verses in a book that promotes wisdom unless this lifestyle was a breeding ground for fools.  Having been a drunken fool in my past also gives me a pretty clear perspective on this sin.  I know first hand the damage that comes from living this way.  I also know that since I was in high school and college things have gotten progressively worse.  Living in a college town and ministering to college students has made me aware that drunkenness on our campuses is running rampant.  We don't even blink any longer - nor do we weep and pray for those who are caught in these lifestyles.  We just say that they're kids and that is the way that kids act these days.  We shrug our shoulders and walk away.  Yet the damage increases every weekend.  I know because I often deal with the young men and women who ache from it.  Maybe instead of just winking at this - we should begin to fall to our knees and pray that God would so revive His church and restore us.  Maybe we should not just complain and vote for dry counties - but also wade into the world of these young men and women who desperately need Jesus Christ in their lives.  Maybe we should fight drunkenness with the greatest weapons we have in our arsenal - the gospel of Jesus Christ - and the truth of God's Word.  Maybe then we could begin to see a harvest - not of drunken fools - but of redeemed ones who have turned to Jesus Christ and, as a result, have become wise!

Argue your case with your neighbor, And do not reveal the secret of another, Or he who hears it will reproach you, And the evil report about you will not pass away. Proverbs 25:9-10

Here is another of those Proverbs that seems to directly contradict what has been said in the previous verse.  Here it has to do with arguing your case with your neighbor.  But the thing that truly helps us to understand this proverb is that it deals with arguing your case with your neighbor "alone."  The ESV and the KJV bring this out.

When a person has a conflict with another person, the best way for it to be resolved is for the two of them to get together and to work it out between them.  This is what the writer of Proverbs is saying here.  This proverb has to do with gossip more than anything else.  When there is a conflict, take the conflict to the person with whom you have the conflict - and no one else.  That is what the writer is saying when he says not to reveal the secret of another.  When there is a conflict, we don't need to reveal that we have had one with everyone else.  That is usually what happens when there is a fight.  We decide to talk with everyone else - telling them about everything that has happened and every way that this other person has hurt us - or has wronged us.  That is revealing the secret of another. 

Here is a concept that I know is foreign to the church today.  When we have a fight or disagreement with someone - that situation is to be treated as if it is a secret between us and the person with whom we've had the disagreement.  It is to remain that way - until we've worked it out with that person.  The reason we should do this is because God will give us grace - and give the person with whom we have the disagreement grace.  But anyone we bring into the situation - will not have grace to deal with it.  They will tend to take one side or the other - and soon factions will begin to develop. 

When the person with whom we have the disagreement begins to hear that we've told others - new problems will develop.  The passage here says that when the person with whom we've had the argument hears that we're talking to others about it - they will reproach us for doing it.  There is an additional offense when this happens.  There are already problems with this person - but now they feel that they are being slandered with gossip. 

Now the next step in all this is that the argument begins to develop into a full-sized war.  They begin to send out an evil report about you.  They are so offended that you've begun to gossip, that they begin to gossip as well.  Just as you decided to share the worst of your disagreement with others - they do the same.  You feel greater offense but what they are doing is only what you've already done to them.  The sad reality with this entire situation is that it will continue toward greater and greater bitterness until one or the other involved with be Christlike enough to humble themselves and begin working toward true healing.  This involves actually talking about the problem to the person with whom you have the problem.  What is so sad is that the vast majority of the time all that happens is that the two people eventually move to an uncomfortable silence between them.  Their relationship becomes superficial - awaiting the next blow up that will come in the future. 

Argue your case with your neighbor alone.  That is wisdom.  It will bless you - and honestly - it will bless your church as well.  This would be such a cause for maturity in the church.  We would have to confront lovingly when we have a problem with a brother - but from what I've experienced - we would also have stronger relationships in the church or wherever we are having problems.  May God bless us so that we begin to take this very wise advice and have stronger relationships in every aspect of life.