He who is slow to anger is better than the mighty, And he who rules his spirit, than he who captures a city. Proverbs 16:32

It is interesting that the wisdom of God puts greater value on persistant patience, longsuffering, and goodness than on sheer physical strength. Self-control was something that was more valued than military heroism. Who truly is the strong man? Is he the guy who can flex his muscles and take up a sword and lead an army? Or could it be the one who can control his own passions and prevent a battle from ever needing to take place?

Could it be that part of the downfall of Goliath was the anger with which he carried out his attack on David? Could it be that in running to the battle line, he did not take care to fight not just with strength, but with wisdom? Could it be that Egypt's anger and rage led them to ride foolishly into the midst of the Red Sea - when everything should have told them to halt their attack? So often the ability to rule our spirit is one of the most difficult things we have to do in life. To halt our tongue from speaking in anger - to refrain from entering the fray when our feelings are hurt - to stop a fight before it begins - all these are not easy things to do - and require a depth and strength of character that is often lacking in men and women.

Samson was indeed a strong, mighty man - physically. But he did not "rule his spirit" at all when it came to anger - and other more dangerous passions. In the end - though he did many mighty acts of valor - he was overcome by the wiles of a woman who knew his lack of control over his spirit. Great fighters know how to get their opponents angry - for then they will no longer be controlled by their mind - but by their rage. It is in such moments that the majority of them make a fatal mistake - and the more talented - more controlled boxer - finds his opening and knocks out his opponent with little more than a blow or two.

We too need to be men who not just physically are strong - but are spiritually and morally strong as well. But the truly wise among us know that such a feat of strength is beyond our flesh. It is only Christ Who truly mastered sin and took it to the grave with Him. He rose victorious over it - and granted to us, through His resurrection, the power to win this illusive victory. It is His power that will allow us to master the most difficult foe of all - that of mastery of our own spirit. Then, dear brothers and sisters, is when we are truly mighty - when we are truly strong - and when we are truly a champion. Just know that the only way this can happen is by coming to know and walk with the ONLY Champion - Jesus Christ!

A hot-tempered man stirs up strife, But the slow to anger calms a dispute.   Proverbs 15:18

Whenever we face a situation where we can react in anger we have a choice.  I know that some don't think so because they say that so-in-so made me angry - or such-and-such a situation made me mad.  The facts would say something much different.  They say that we control our temperment - not that circumstances and people control what we do.  Today's proverb helps us understand this.  Each day as we begin to interact with people and face a world filled with its varicolored situations, we need to do so making a conscious choice.  What that choice should be is the topic of God's wise counsel to us in this verse.

We have a choice whether we are going to be "hot-tempered" or not.  The Hebrew word for "hot-tempered" is very instructive and descriptive here.  It is "chemah" and means to be rage-filled, angry, and filled with poison or venom.  This is fascinating because we need to make a conscious choice not to have the venom and poison of the evil one flowing through our veins as we walk through our day.  By this I am not saying that we are demon possessed or anything fantastical like that.  Instead I refer to a much more subtle thing that energizes the strife that will follow such a man through his day.  Let me explain.

Each day we live we interact with others and with our environment from morning to night.  As we do this we have both problems and problem people come into our lives.  It is possible as we do this to be bitten by the evil one in such a way that his venom and poison enters our system.  This usually happens when someone hurts our feelings - or tramples what we perceive to be our right to be treated better or with a certain modicum of respect.  It can also happen when we begin to entertain the thought that a certain set of providential circumstances are a raw deal.  If we are not careful to cry out to God to remove such venom from the veins of our thinking and our heart - it can begin to do its insidious work in us.  Over time this poison will turn to bitterness against someone - resentment grows to a point where what at first was an annoyance becomes a seething cauldron of anger and rage toward someone.  In regard to circumstances that our God allows providentially in our lives, we can think Him cruel and uncaring.  This poison will turn our hearts a deep shade of bitter - and we soon find it hard to read His Word, pray, and ultimately to trust Hiim to cause all things to work for good.  As the infection spreads deeper in our reasoning, we soon become angry at our core - which is where this one is in this verse.  Thus the temper of his soul is such that he is constantly stirring up strife.  I've known men over the years who say that trouble seems to follow them.  But in a majority of the cases, they were one who had allowed the venom of the evil one through slights and circumstantial difficulties to  reach a critical mass in their hearts.  The trouble they perceived to follow them - really was trouble that they encoruaged because they are so angry in their core.  I've even watched this in some who do this not through active agression - but through passive-agressive actions and words (or the lack of them). 

There is another choice we can make in the Lord.  That is that we become those who calm disputes.  These are those who have at their core a work of the grace of God that makes them slow to anger.  The Hebrew word used for this is one that is also used to describe long pinions - which are the largest feathers on the wing of birds.  These particular feathers are used in birds to reduce drag on their wings thus helping them control both the wind and the turbulence that is natural in the sky while they fly.  What an astounding picture this is for us of the patient, long-suffering man who chooses to calm disputes rather than fuel them.  Like a bird who uses their long pinions to ride the wind while diffusing the problems it causes - these people ride the events of everyday life.  They choose to deflect and diffuse both the insults and indignities of life - as well as the problematic providences that we cannot change.  Rather than  having such things make their flight a bumpy one, their choice to be slow to anger allows them to ride the difficulties of living on earth rather than having the things of earth ride rough-shod over them.

A wise man knows that life is not going to be fair - neither is it going to bow down and kiss his feet every day.  He knows that since we live in a fallen world, that he will run into fallen people who act . . . well, they act fallen.  Therefore he chooses to turn to God, who deals with the indignities of over 7 billion people daily, and yet who does not consume them with His wrath.  This grace daily allows him to stretch forth his spiritual pinions and diffuse the problems and the poison that would turn him from being a peaceful, gracious man into an angry strife-ridden one.  May God give us mercy that we would be such men and women.

He who is slow to anger has great understanding, But he who is quick-tempered exalts folly. Proverbs 14:29

We see throughout the book of Proverbs that a quick temper is a negative thing in a person's life. It can get us into a world of trouble. Here we read that the man who is quick-tempered exalts folly. Giving in to anger, resentment, and bitterness in our lives only exalts folly. The idea here expressed is that it is the "unthinking" and "unreasoning" way to live our lives. Anyone can become frustrated or angry and then give in to having a blowout that involves a temper flaring up and expressing itself in hurtful words or actions. That exalts stupidity and living foolishly. What then, can keep us from exalting folly by being quick-tempered?

The Bible says that someone who is slow to anger has great understanding. The word for understanding here is "tebunah" and it means to have both understanding and insight. It is taking both knowledge and wisdom and applying it in a way that helps us look into our anger and examine it before reacting. That indeed is wisdom. We need to ask ourselves the question, "Why am I so angry about this?" Looking into our reaction often will make us ask deeper questions and deal on a deeper level than just saying, "I'm so angry about this!"

When we probe our anger we need to be ready to run into personal issues that exist on the inside of our lives. I will never forget the shock it was to me when an older, wiser man told me the reason I got so angry with my children was because of my pride. On the inside I wanted to snap back that it was their disobedience that was making me mad - not something wrong with me. In no way was this man saying I should not have disciplined them for being disobedient and rebellious - he was only saying that I needed to see why at times I felt out of control while doing it. His wise counsel was that my pride and anger came from a desire to control my children - so they would never disobey. My reason behind this thought was that my kids made me look bad as a parent when they disobeyed - and that made me angry. A wise parent would know that children are GOING to be disobedient because they are sons of Adam.

The fall of man will ensure that every child will be disobedient and rebellious in some way. Therefore having a disobedient child does not mean you are a bad parent. A parent who is failing in their role is one who does not discipline his or her child for their disobedience. I was failing not because I was disciplining my child - but becasue at times I was doing so in anger. My anger was foolish because I was expecting my child never to disobey - so I would look good in other people's eyes. Therefore my anger - when disected with understanding - was due to a couple of foolish things. First, I was not grasping the true nature of a child. Second, I was wanting my child to be good so I would not be bothered with having to interrupt MY DAY with things I did not want to do. Third, the reason I wanted a "good child" was so that my glory could be advanced. When looking at my quick-tempered responses suddenly I was a little horrified (understatement of the year) at their root. It was pride! Therefore wisdom applied - understanding deepened - and a willingness to have the Holy Spirit probe deeper into my motivations yielded repentance . . . and it yielded an ability over time to be much slower to anger.

Let me encourage any of you who are struggling with being quick-tempered. Take the time to submit yourself to the Holy Spirit. Allow Him to take you deeper into your angry responses in order to look at them and see them at the level of your heart motivations. He will walk you through this process and will help you to understand why you have a quick-temper at times. I will not say that this is pleasant - but God will do it with a view to repentance and restoration. He will do so with great grace and comfort - as well as a little heart surgery that will help you to become someone who is far more slow to anger. You will find that His grace and His gospel will be enough to turn from quick-tempered foolishness to patient love and understanding.