The fear of the LORD is the instruction for wisdom, And before honor comes humility. Proverbs 15:33
There are few people who do not want to be wise. The rub comes when they learn how to become wise. There is even a higher cost when you learn the method by which God will bring us to the point where we become wise. The first thing we need to grasp is that wisdom comes from God. If men, in their experience of life, manifest wisdom - it is only because they have stumbled across it over the course of their lives. Even a blind squirrel will find a few nuts as he wanders underneath the trees. Wisdom is defined best as seeing things as God sees them. Therefore if we are going to become wise - we will have to respect God and what He has to say. That is the crux of what Solomon is saying here when he states that the fear of Jehovah is the instruction for wisdom. If we do not respect and reverence God - we are fools. If we do not honor Him and give Him the honor which He deserves, we will not be wise in the end. We note here that the fear of Jehovah is the "instruction" for wisdom. The word for instruction here is the Hebrew word "musar" which means to instruct with discipline. This means far more than just learning something in our heads. This involves both mental instruction of the head - and discipline to make sure that what goes into our heads is then applied and carried out in our lives. This often involves some correction, pain, and difficulty as we have to learn to value God's perspective more than our own. This is the process of wisdom - and depending on how stubborn or prideful we are in holding to our particular perspective - how painful and hard it will be to become wise. The last part of this proverb lets us know the one overarching principle that will apply throughout this entire process. "Before honor comes humility." Humans (at least fallen ones - and that means all of us) want the honor now. They want honor immediately. If we want the honor of other men and the world that may be possible. If we want the honor that comes from God and that is lasting - we will have to take a different path. Honor from God requires humility first. It is the humility that is willing to empty ourselves and lay our own will and ego down. This is what Christ Jesus did according to Philippians 2, and God requires nothing less of us. Oh how hard the human will goes down. But in order to be wise - and to receive honor from God - that is what we will have to do. But such wisdom and such honor is better than anyting billion things the world can offer us in the way of its trinkets and trash. Want to be wise? Want lasting, eternal honor? Then wisdom is what you want. You will haae to first admit you don't have any - and then turn to the only One Who can give it to you. You will need to see your view of God raised infinitely higher - where you find His wisdom and guidance impeccable in every way. You will need to embrace His thoughts and working in your mind even in the most difficult times when honestly, it does not make sense. You will need to lay your own thoughts in the dust - until you learn that they are in agreement with His - then praise Him for enlighening your mind to have such thoughts. This is the way of wisdom - which is also the way of humility. But I can promise you by the Word of the Lord that this is also the way of true happiness, true contentment, and a true reward that will last infinitely beyond any trophy, any medal, any certificate, or any human reward that will fade and fade away with time.
2 Comments
He whose ear listens to the life-giving reproof Will dwell among the wise. He who neglects discipline despises himself, But he who listens to reproof acquires understanding. Proverbs 15:31-32
If you want to be wise, you will have to learn the value of reproof and rebuke. That is a tough thing to do because very few of us take to these things at all. We are fallen creatures therefore a couple things are true of us. First of all, we usually think we are right. This creates a problem because we react with pride and defensiveness when we are rebuked and reproved. Second of all, we are rebellious. Therefore when someone offers correction our first response is to resist and resent it. But as we will see from today's proverb of the day, these things can really hurt us. We dwell among the wise when our ear is open to "life-giving reproof." I am so glad that when God inspired this He made a distinction between life-giving reproof and other kinds of reproof. The difference between these two is that life-giving reproof is correction that is bent toward blessing us and offering us rebuke that will turn us away from sin and turn us to God who gives us life. To be reproved in this way turns us from our own way, the way of the world, and the way of destruction - which is how the devil will seek to offer us. Thus it turns us away from death and sin, and instead points us into the way of life - or said another way - into the ways of God. Regular reproof is correction based out of an idividual's preferences. Jesus was reproved . . . often. He faced Pharisees who rebuked Him for His teaching, His miracles, and the people He chose to hang around. People will reprove you for walking in the ways of God. This kind of reproof requires both understanding and discernment on our part. Just because someone reproves you, does not mean that they are correct in their reproof. That is why Solomon warns us only to open our ear to "life-giving" reproof. We read in verse 32 of a person who neglects discipline. The word discipline means instruction that offers truth and a disciplinary rebuke or correction. Godly men and women offer discipline to us to bless us in the end. But the unwise man rejects it outright. When he does this Scripture tells us that he "despises himself." He hates himself when he does these things. The rejection of all discipline and moral limits will destroy our lives. You can easily see in a child who is a spoiled brat this danger. The child gets his own way - and is not corrected so as to learn wise and godly behavior. In the end this child will destroy himself with their selfishness and self-centered behavior. The one who listens to godly reproof will aquire "understanding." The word here refers to the heart - or the inner moral life and compass that we need to have. When we listen to reproof and learn from it - our inner moral compass is set by God's standards. We learn right and wrong. We may simply respond to discipline by avoiding the pain of it at first. This is the response of a child who is spanked early on in life. The initially avoid the behaviors to avoid pain. But after a while the child, if trained properly, is also learning "why" they are not to do something. The process teaches understanding. The child learns from the wisdom of the parent that there are reasons to avoid the moral bahavior. This understanding will guide them and teach them that when discpline comes - it is from love that people offer it. When followed such wisdom will truly bless any man or woman who will take the time - and often the pain that rebuke often brings - to learn from it. The way of the lazy is as a hedge of thorns, But the path of the upright is a highway. Proverbs 15:19
How are you at getting to things in life? Is it difficult to get going on things - to start projects - to get things done at work - at home - anywhere? This is an interesting thing to consider, especially in light of the proverb for today. We are going to see that this trait may point to things that may have cause for some serious thought - and possibly some repentance. The way of the lazy is as a hedge of thorns. This is the first thing we see as we look at today's proverb. First we see that God's word calls a man lazy. This is a character description. It means that he will not work - or better said from this verse - won't get around to working. He is probably undisciplined and most likely unprofitable to himself, his employer, his family, and ultimately his God. His way, we read here, is as a hedge of thorns. Biblically this is more than just our garden variety North American thorn hedge. In Israel they had some very serious thorn hedges. They were extremely thick and were excellent fences around their fields. Pretty much nothing could get through these hedges. For the lazy man - his way is as a hedge of thorns. The word "way" here means his lifestyle. This man is averse to work, therefore he can find a million different reasons why he does not work. They sound somewhat convincing until you realize he is just lazy and doesn't want to work. His excuses are lame - and simply are cover for his lack of character. The upright has a much different path. This man is godly and understands the value of faithfulness and working hard. Rather than constantly finding ways that he can get out of work - the godly man wants to do things that benefit his family, his friends, his community, and ultimately even himself. His path is like a highway - nothing blocking him and preventing him from accomplishing his goals. To answer the questions at the beginning of this article, we should turn and take a good look at our actions. Then we should turn again and look inward a little. What is it that is keeping us from getting things done like we want? It is not the things we might think. It is a lack of character and godliness. The Holy Spirit wants to bear fruit in our lives - fruit like faithfulness and self-control. If we do not see such things in our lifestyle - maybe we should take a closer look at things like our adherance to a biblical work ethic. Maybe we should also take a much closer look at our spiritual condition and walk with God. If our proverb is right, we may just find the answers to our questions there. Going Deeper in Your Understanding about Anger and Quick-tempered Responses Proverbs 14:291/12/2012 He who is slow to anger has great understanding, But he who is quick-tempered exalts folly. Proverbs 14:29
We see throughout the book of Proverbs that a quick temper is a negative thing in a person's life. It can get us into a world of trouble. Here we read that the man who is quick-tempered exalts folly. Giving in to anger, resentment, and bitterness in our lives only exalts folly. The idea here expressed is that it is the "unthinking" and "unreasoning" way to live our lives. Anyone can become frustrated or angry and then give in to having a blowout that involves a temper flaring up and expressing itself in hurtful words or actions. That exalts stupidity and living foolishly. What then, can keep us from exalting folly by being quick-tempered? The Bible says that someone who is slow to anger has great understanding. The word for understanding here is "tebunah" and it means to have both understanding and insight. It is taking both knowledge and wisdom and applying it in a way that helps us look into our anger and examine it before reacting. That indeed is wisdom. We need to ask ourselves the question, "Why am I so angry about this?" Looking into our reaction often will make us ask deeper questions and deal on a deeper level than just saying, "I'm so angry about this!" When we probe our anger we need to be ready to run into personal issues that exist on the inside of our lives. I will never forget the shock it was to me when an older, wiser man told me the reason I got so angry with my children was because of my pride. On the inside I wanted to snap back that it was their disobedience that was making me mad - not something wrong with me. In no way was this man saying I should not have disciplined them for being disobedient and rebellious - he was only saying that I needed to see why at times I felt out of control while doing it. His wise counsel was that my pride and anger came from a desire to control my children - so they would never disobey. My reason behind this thought was that my kids made me look bad as a parent when they disobeyed - and that made me angry. A wise parent would know that children are GOING to be disobedient because they are sons of Adam. The fall of man will ensure that every child will be disobedient and rebellious in some way. Therefore having a disobedient child does not mean you are a bad parent. A parent who is failing in their role is one who does not discipline his or her child for their disobedience. I was failing not because I was disciplining my child - but becasue at times I was doing so in anger. My anger was foolish because I was expecting my child never to disobey - so I would look good in other people's eyes. Therefore my anger - when disected with understanding - was due to a couple of foolish things. First, I was not grasping the true nature of a child. Second, I was wanting my child to be good so I would not be bothered with having to interrupt MY DAY with things I did not want to do. Third, the reason I wanted a "good child" was so that my glory could be advanced. When looking at my quick-tempered responses suddenly I was a little horrified (understatement of the year) at their root. It was pride! Therefore wisdom applied - understanding deepened - and a willingness to have the Holy Spirit probe deeper into my motivations yielded repentance . . . and it yielded an ability over time to be much slower to anger. Let me encourage any of you who are struggling with being quick-tempered. Take the time to submit yourself to the Holy Spirit. Allow Him to take you deeper into your angry responses in order to look at them and see them at the level of your heart motivations. He will walk you through this process and will help you to understand why you have a quick-temper at times. I will not say that this is pleasant - but God will do it with a view to repentance and restoration. He will do so with great grace and comfort - as well as a little heart surgery that will help you to become someone who is far more slow to anger. You will find that His grace and His gospel will be enough to turn from quick-tempered foolishness to patient love and understanding. He who withholds his rod hates his son, But he who loves him disciplines him diligently. Proverbs 13:24
Child discipline is an issue today that is quickly being taken over by worldly psychologists and child-advocates who think that spanking a child or administering any kind of coporal punishment is child abuse. Yet from what we see in Proverbs today, child abuse should be defined a little differently. It should be defined as those who refuse to apply the rod of discipline to their children in a loving way so as to train them to be unselfish. The rod is mentioned here - and is it mentioned because the parent is supposed to apply the rod to the child's rear-end in a controlled way for the purpose of training that child properly. This is to be done without a fit of anger or rage - for disciplining under that kind of spirit will often lead to over-disciplining a child - or hitting them out of anger - rather than out of a desire to train and teach. The wise man and woman discipline their child - because to refrain from discipline is to hate your child. These are strong words - and need to be examined. When we refuse to discipline a child - we are leaving them to the dictates of their sinful nature. Contrary to the world-view of modern psychology, the Bible does not teach that man is basically good. The Bible teaches that we are evil because of man's fall into sin. Because of that event - and the effect it had on all mankind - we are basically selfish and self-centered. Left on our own, we will become little monsters who demand our own way. There is also another problem with the sinful nature and the way it works in our hearts. The natural man does not submit himself to rules or authority very well. A child will learn to say, "No" early in life, and needs to be trained to submit to authority and to rules. Our sinfulness has us react to rules by wanting to buck them and do our own thing. This needs to be an area of child training. We need to teach our children to obey - and to submit to the authority that is over them. Without this they will not function well in society. When a child learns to be obedient, learns to be respectful, learns to work hard and be selfless in his attitude and actions it is a blessing to all those around him. Consider what an entire society would look like with this kind of parenting? The Bible says that we need to discipline our children "diligently." I will be honest with you - that this is difficult to do. At times I would only discipline my children when they annoyed me enough to merit my all-important time and effort. Hope you got the sarcasm in that statement. Disciplining your children diligently requires a full commitment to seeing character and godliness developed in them. You cannot just discipline them when you get mad because they are making your life difficult. Discipline requires a full commitment of your life. This may seem like a lot, but let me give another testimony about this kind of child-rearing. We have 6 children - 2 guys and 4 girls. We are not model parents by any stretch of the word. God has given us much grace as we stumbled and tried our best in this whole thing called parenting. But one thing we have noticed is that when you give yourself to parenting after this model - you truly enjoy being with your children throughout your life. We love being with our kids - and have the best time when we are. They are a delight to our hearts. I remember sharing with someone in a grocery store that we have 6 children. Her response was whether we were still sane - and how much Prozac we needed to handle that many kids. I smiled when she said this, but quickly stated that our kids were a delight - and that God gave us much grace and that is what helped us rear 6 kids. That is the joy of living this way and rearing your children. It is a blessing not only to your children as they mature - but it is a blessing to you and your wife as well. The truth is that God is maturing not just your kids - He is maturing you as well. POSTSCRIPT: Recently, individuals have quoted articles from this section and stated that we teach child abuse at Calvary Chapel Jonesboro. To this I feel the need to respond. First, biblically, we are told that if we have a problem with our brother to go to our brother - not the internet - and confront our brother. To date, these individuals have yet to contact me to discuss these things. That should say volumes in itself. Second, we do not teach child abuse at our fellowship. This blog is an endeavor to teach what is in the Bible for the edification and upbuilding of God's people. Anyone who has been to our fellowship knows that in our classrooms we administer NO physical discipline. We correct with words and with "time outs" and eventually with a report to parents. From our nursery throughout every age group our people are instructed NEVER to administer physical discipline. We believe this right alone belongs to a parent. Even then we teach the following about any application of physical discipline. Discipline is about the heart of a child. Physical or corporal punishment is ONLY to be administered in a spirit of love for the child. Teaching and loving verbal correction is key - as is prayer for the child's eventual salvation in Jesus Christ. Any physical punishment administered due to anger or rage is out of line and wrong. The parent is to discipline the child with appropriate discipline - not abuse. In the end the child should be taught - and in every circumstance hugged, loved, and prayed with after any physical punishment to assure them of our love. The idea of a "beating" is completely out of step with what the Scriptures are teaching. Instead the idea of loving discipline is intended. Assuredly, the evil man will not go unpunished, But the descendants of the righteous will be delivered. Proverbs 11:21
Punishment is something people do not want to discuss. We live in a day when we are uncomfortable talking about people being punished. Yet Scripture makes it very clear that God is going to bring judgment upon the wicked and the evil. Today's proverb addresses these things. The proverb starts off with an interesting Hebraism. The proverb says, "hand in hand" as it begins. This phrase means that though people join hand in hand. It speaks of those who are evil. There are many evil men and women who feel that if they join hands - their evil can prevail. One of the most famous of biblical examples of this is the people who joined together together to build the Tower of Babel. They did this so that they would not be scattered. They constructed the tower in rebellion against God. Their thought was that together their project would prevail against God's will. But this is why the verse opens up with this statement - assuredly. Thus we know that even though every wicked man and woman on the planet were to join hands to stand agaisnt God - the fact is that they will not go unpunished. God's judgment WILL prevail - and His authority and power will prevail over any who choose evil. The evil man will be punished - end of story. But there is more - because God promises that the righteous will be delivered from the wrath of God. He promises that there will be deliverance for the seed of the righteous. God is going to destroy the wicked - but His grace will cause the righteous to be delivered from that judgment and wrath. The righteous here are not those who are self-righteous - but rather those who are righteous by faith. They have believed on the lamb of God who was slain from the foundation of the world. Their righteousness was not based on their own works - but rather on the work of Jesus Christ. This is what will deliver the righteous from the judgment of God. They are delivered because of the righteousness of Jesus Christ. That is what speaks for them before a holy God. Remember this . . . one man will face punishment - while another will be delivered from the wrath of God. One embraces evil - the other what is right. In the end the one who chose righteouensss made the truly wise choice. For no matter how many hands were gathered together - they will never stand before a holy God. All that will matter in that day is whether we have the righteousness that comes from God on the basis of faith. On the lips of the discerning, wisdom is found, But a rod is for the back of him who lacks understanding. Wise men store up knowledge, But with the mouth of the foolish, ruin is at hand. Proverbs 10:13-14
A godly mouth can be a great blessing to anyone who has one granted to him by the grace of God. Such a mouth, though given by God, must be disciplined to follow Him only - and not the foolishness of the natural man. The wisdom of God is found on a certain kind of man. He is called a discerning man. The Hebrew word used here is "bin" and it speaks of someone who through the use of the Scriptures is able to determine the difference between what is of God and what is not. This discerning heart and mind instructs the lips of the wise man. We learn later in verse 14 that this man stores up knowledge. This knowledge is a practical knowing of God and of the world that is around him. Thus this wise man instructs his mouth with this knowledge. He learns to know much, but not always speak what he knows. He has learned that he can NOT say things and be a blessing. Thus he seeks to quell within himself words and statements that will unnecessaily disburb the peace in relationships. Many an argument and fight could be prevented if one or the other of the two combatants would have practiced this wisdom. They would keep their words to themselves - knowing that sharing their "knowledge" would be done more from pride than from love. We know from the New Testament that knowledge puffs up - but love edifies. We can share all our knowledge - and by doing so cause a disturbance as others react to our pride. The wise man stores up knowledge within - and only brings that knowledge out at the direction of the Holy Spirit - Who will direct him to use that knowledge to build up and encourage others. We are also told of the fool - and his mouth. These two verses go together because they speak of the speech of one - and then the consequences of the other. The next verse reverses this order - trading the wise man for the fool in his speech - and the fool for the wise man in the reward or retribution that results. The consequences of the fool is a rod for his back. His words are the source of his punishment - for they evidence his foolishness and lack of regard for what is right. A proverb from the Talmud expresses this wonderfully when we read there, "that which a wise man gains by a hint, a fool only obtains by a club." The wise man learns - instructs his mouth and heart with that wisdom - and therefore avoids problems and public discipline. The fool chooses to let his mouth run - and with that overactive mouth - ruin comes to him. Biblically we can remember the difference between Solomon and his son, Rehoboam. Solomon began his reign seeking God and requesting wisdom from Him. His son Rehoboam had an opportunity to win over the people - but chose the foolish counsel of his friends. That led him to speak harsh, unkind, oppressive words to the people. In the end he lost all but one tribe - which God granted to him because of His promise to David. But how the foolish mouth granted him much destruction and difficulty. The wise mouth, though, was blessed in many wonderful ways. So take the time to listen - and allow God's wisdom to sink deep enough into your heart so that it instructs your mouth on what to say. Doing this promotes blessing. Four things are small on the earth, But they are exceedingly wise: the ants are not a strong people, But they prepare their food in the summer; Proverbs 30:24-25
Here is a section in Proverbs that urges us to look at the glory of God in nature - as well as the lessons that He wants to teach us from what He has made in the animal kingdom. God has the writer call our attention to four animals that are small, yet exceedingly wise. Therefore our job is to look at these animals and glean what we can from their habits and their actions. This is also a kind of shot at the "bigger is always better" mentality that exists in our world. The saying should be "wiser is better." Since that is true in almost every situation, why don't we apply ourselves to learning from the ants, shapharim, locusts, and lizard for a few days. We are first called to look at ants. This is kind of funny, because among the boys that I hung out with as a child, we all looked at ants. We were amazed at them as they worked hard - and as they marched on in their single line to and from a food source until they had gathered every last bit of it and taken it to their home. This is what we are called to see from the ant their wisdom in preparing food when it is a season to do so - and preparing it for a time when there will be no sowing and reaping because winter has come and the growing cycle is dormant. We are reminded of a previous proverb in chatper 6:6-8 telling us to go to the ant and learn from her ways so that we will not be sluggards - so that we will not be lazy and undisciplined in providing for our families. The wisdom of the ant is that he prepares when he can for a time when he will need what he has prepared. This makes the ant exceedingly wise. In this life we need to be wise in preparing for the future as best we can. That meant for me getting life insurance to put my wife's heart at ease in the event I die before her. That meant learning to manage our finances, paying off debt, and then seeking to stay out of debt. It meant living within our means - and when possible and within the will of God - working hard at additional things to provide additional funds for things like our children's education and paying off our home early. Please understand that the example of the ant is that he works HARD when he can to provide. That is the other exceedingly wise thing we should learn - that it is godly to work HARD to provide for your family. This also should remind us of this responsiblity in spiritual things as well. Are we "working hard" spiritually for our families - growing in the Lord, studying the Scriptures, praying, being a godly example? Your children need to see this EARLY in our lives - because there will come a day when they will decide which direction they are going in life. Know this, they will far more follow our example that they will what we've told them to do - especially when these two things did not match up in our lives. I want to relate a passage I read from J. Vernon McGee on the ant. He wrote about the emperor Hadrian, who was a wicked ruler in the Roman empire. It was related that he said the following when he was dying, "No more crown for this head, no more beauty for these eyes, no more music for these ears, and no morefood for this stomach of mine. But my soul, oh, my soul, what is to become of you?" The reason I share this is because wisdom prepares now for something that you cannot prepare for in the future after it has come. The Word of God lets us know in Hebrews 9:27 that after we die physically there will be a judgment. Jesus informs us in the gospels that we will be judged for every idle word that we speak. Romans informs us that if we want to live by the Law, we will be judged by it - and that no one is ever made righteous by the Law. Instead they are made painfully aware of their heart of rebellion and their sin. So the question for us is also this. Have we made preparation for the future by drawing near to God and running to His remedy for our souls in the gospel of Jesus Christ? There is no other way for men to be made right with God. There is no other name under heaven by which we must be saved. There is no other way, truth, of life - except Jesus Christ - and He is the only way to come to the Father except through Him. To delay in this is foolishness of the ultimate kind. Be exceedingly wise like the ant - and while it is a time to work - work hard. While it is a time to grow spiritually - apply yourself wholly to this task. Finally, while it is the day of salvation - repent and believe on the Lord Jesus Christ. She looks for wool and flax And works with her hands in delight. She is like merchant ships; She brings her food from afar. She rises also while it is still night And gives food to her household And portions to her maidens. She considers a field and buys it; From her earnings she plants a vineyard. Proverbs 31:13-16
The godly woman as represented here in Proverbs 31 is a lady who enjoys working with her hands, with her mind, and with her physical strength in order to bless her household. In verse 13 we see where she enjoys working with her hands. She is skilled enough to discover the kind of wool and flax that will make good clothing for her family - and even possibly items that she could sell to others. When she discovers these things, she then delights in doing busy work - working hard with her hands as she makes things for others. This evidences both a willingness to work hard - and a willingness to make things for others rather than focus all her time upon herself. This she does "willingly" which is what the word "delight" means in this passage. It speaks of her as being a worker who does what she does not because of complusion or by being forced - but simply because she desires to do these things. This blessed lady also delights in providing meals for her loved ones. These meals are not just the normal fare of everyday life - although I am sure that these are included in what she does for her family. Verses 14 reveals that she delights in "bringing her food from afar" like a merchant would do so. This paints a picture for us of how she delights to cook and provide meals for her family. She works hard at making things more exciting and varied for her husband and children. She is not focused on just the "ready-made" stuff that she can pick up in a box (although that was not the case in this day) - but she brings her food from even far off for the benefit of those she loves. Verse 15 shows us that she uses her head as she manages a household not just with her family, but also her servants. She rises before dawn to make sure that all those in her care are blessed. This means not just her children, but even her servants. She is there to give sustenance to her family - but also to her maidens who work for her in the household. Verse 16 shows us that this lady is also financially savvy. Here we see that she takes the time to consider a field in which she desires to plant a vineyard. Here she is making decisions that involve knowledge of agriculture and of real estate. What land would be best for the purpose of planting, tending, and therefore profiting from a vineyard. As she does this, we can see that from the earnings that she has already gained from previous wise financial decisions, she purchases land for a new venture. She is wanting to continue to prosper her family and is working toward that end. She is doing this with money "she" has earned - thus we see that her husband trusts her fully with financial means - and however she started these ventures - now she has earned sufficiently enough to pursue them solely on the basis of money she has earned doing other things. What we come away with in all these verses about the godly woman is that she is not at all one-dimensional. Some would teach Proverbs 31 as if a godly woman is all about "God-stuff" like Bible study, prayer, etc. But such a division in an understanding of godliness and especially the godliness of this godly woman is a false dichotomy. Her life is more than just "church" activity. She is wise in every respect - religiously, financially, managerially, and even with a wonderful business sense. Thus we see that godliness covers far more than just the usual categorizations. This lady is wise in every respect. But then again maybe that is why she is praised so highly - because her benefit to the family covers a multitude of blessings that come to them from her. Foolishness is bound up in the heart of a child; The rod of discipline will remove it far from him. Proverbs 22:15
Ah, we come to the NOT-Dr. Spock proverb. If you do not know who Dr. Spock is the first thing I should tell you is that he is not the pointy-eared science officer from the Star Trek series. He is a child psychologist from the 1960's who announced to the world through his writings that spanking a child was wrong. Unfortunately an entire generation decided that he was right (after all he is a psychologist!) and that God was wrong. If you are wondering the results of that choice, take a look at our society today. Foolishness is bound up in the heart of a child. This is a view that is also rejected by the vast majority of psychologists and educators today. We are told that we need to let children "express themselves." When we try to impose our views upon them - we are only warping them in our image. I can only tell you that when we add a biblical worldview to the practice of guiding and disciplining a child - people in the academic world tend to go ballistic. But the biblical fact is, well . . . fact. The Bible reprents mankind as fallen and ruined due to sin. That includes little ones fresh out of the womb. I know that it is very easy to look at little ones and think, "Oh, they are so cute - they're just little angels." The problem is that they are NOT little angels. The Biblical view is that they are little fools - and will remain that way unless we apply the rod of discipline in their lives. Children will basically be selfish and self-centered. The will have a tendency toward sin - and if left to themselves without discipline will become little tyrants. Some will howl with disapproval for this statement saying that not all children are this way. I've helped rear six children and would be the first to say that different children have different ways that they express their sinful nature - but every one of them needed discipline to keep from being fools. Some of my children were active in their rebellion - others were passive in how they disobeyed - but without a doubt they all disobeyed naturally. God's Word says that what we are after is their hearts. Note that we read that foolishness is bound up in a child's heart. We are not aiming for their bottoms - although that is where the discipline usually is administered. We are aiming for their hearts. We want them to see that they are fallen and that they need God. We want them to see that they are foolish and need the wisdom of God. We want them to see that they are sinful and need the forgiveness of God. We also want them to see that they are bound in sin and desperately need the deliverance of God. Finally, we need for them to see that they are fatally flawed and need the regeneration of God that comes with salvation. They need their "heart of stone" to be replaced at salvation with the heart of flesh that God promises in the new covenant. One reason we do this is because they must learn that discipline is the way of life. God will continue to discipline them as Hebrews 12:5-9 says. If we are His children - we WILL be disciplined. Thus we are to be trained by our parents early to learn to receive discipline and to learn from it. The rod of discipline is applied to help remove the foolishness from our hearts. As it does its work, we will grow in wisdom and understanding - and will learn to put away foolish things from our lives. There are some who will argue that the "rod" mentioned here is just words. But the word itself means a rod or stick - a club or the stick in a spear. I will not argue with those who say that at times God refers to the rod of His mouth. But when it comes to child training there are other passages in Proverbs that make it clear that we are to spank our children in disciplining them. This being said, I will also state clearly that over-spanking a child is abuse - and that God's Word refers to "LOVING" discipline that should be administered. Simply grabbing a child and swatting them is very ineffective. There should be instruction, clear boundaries, discipline, as well as reassuring love that is given after any kind of spanking that is given to a child. Our children need to know that we are not disciplining them because they are annoying us. We are discplining them so that they will become pliable in the hands of God - and so that they will learn not to embrace foolishness when it presents itself in their minds or through their friends and aquaintences. This is the kind of discipline that will train up that child. It is also the kind that will help them love their parents - and later the Lord for what He is doing. They will see that this is a very positive thing done out of love and always done with their ultimate best interests in mind. POSTSCRIPT: Recently, individuals have quoted articles from this section and stated that we teach child abuse at Calvary Chapel Jonesboro. To this I feel the need to respond. First, biblically, we are told that if we have a problem with our brother to go to our brother - not the internet - and confront our brother. To date, these individuals have yet to contact me to discuss these things. That should say volumes in itself. Second, we do not teach child abuse at our fellowship. This blog is an endeavor to teach what is in the Bible for the edification and upbuilding of God's people. Anyone who has been to our fellowship knows that in our classrooms we administer NO physical discipline. We correct with words and with "time outs" and eventually with a report to parents. From our nursery throughout every age group our people are instructed NEVER to administer physical discipline. We believe this right alone belongs to a parent. Even then we teach the following about any application of physical discipline. Discipline is about the heart of a child. Physical or corporal punishment is ONLY to be administered in a spirit of love for the child. Teaching and loving verbal correction is key - as is prayer for the child's eventual salvation in Jesus Christ. Any physical punishment administered due to anger or rage is out of line and wrong. The parent is to discipline the child with appropriate discipline - not abuse. In the end the child should be taught - and in every circumstance hugged, loved, and prayed with after any physical punishment to assure them of our love. The idea of a "beating" is completely out of step with what the Scriptures are teaching. Instead the idea of loving discipline is intended. |
Proverb a DayEach day, we'll take a look at a verse from the chapter of Proverbs for the day. Our hope is to gain wisdom each day - and from that wisdom - to have understanding to make godly decisions in the throes of everyday life. Thank you for visiting our website! Everything on this site is offered for free. If, however, you would like to make a donation to help pay for its continued presence on the internet, you can do that by clicking here. The only thing we ask is that you give first to the local church you attend. Thank you!
Archives
August 2018
Copyright 2024 Calvary Chapel Jonesboro | all rights reserved |