My son, give attention to my words; Incline your ear to my sayings. Proverbs 4:20
Proverbs is filled with admonitions from a father to a son. This is a large part of this book - the importance of a father teaching his children the things of God. This is something that has been lost to several generations in our country - and we can easily see the damage that results from it in multiple generations of American men. The father speaks bold words to his son - telling him to pay attention to the word that he speaks to him. Dads, there is little that is as important as being able to speak this way to your sons. This does not happen overnight because you decide to do it. Cultivate this with your sons by spending time with them. Turn off the television and put down whatever it is that you think is so important - and build a relationship with your boys! This dad gained the ability to say such things by being a part of his son's life. Having gained that position, he speaks boldly telling his son to pay attention to his words. Have you made it clear to your son that the things you say to him are important? This is no small matter. If a father practices neglect of his sons early, they will see no place for his words. His words are spoken so seldom that they do not matter to him. If a father plays the fool all the time his son will not take him seriously. If a father is harsh his son will reject his words because there is no love in them. But the father who consistently loves and speaks with his son - both about fun and serious things - will win his heart. When this takes place his son will know that the words of his Father truly matter - and he will pay close attention to them. This dad wants his son to truly hear - and grasp the things that he says. The idea behind paying close attention to him means to listen carefully so as to heed and obey. He also says that his son should "incline" his ear to his father's sayings. The word incline has the idea of stretching out and extending something. It is a call for his son to stretch out his ears - to strain himself to hear what his dad is saying to him. The Hebrew word "emer" here has an interesting aspect to it. When used in its root form, this term meant a saying, but it usually also involved a quotation spoken after it. For those of us who walk with God, this is pretty amazing. It is a reminder that not only do we need to give our kids wise commands for their moral choices - but that we also need to include a quotation afterward. That quotation needs to be from the Scriptures. It is so vital that our moral statements have true moral authority. So, we quote the Word to our sons as we tell them the way that they should walk and live in life. Men, it is so important that we speak to our sons. It is important that they hear from us the morals and the values that they should have in life. It is also important that as we share these things we let them know that our values and morals do not arise out of the ash pits of American society and the shifting sands of public or political opinion. Our valures are rooted in God's revelation of Himself in Scripture - in the Bible. They have their footings dug deep into the 10 commandments, the Sermon on the Mount, and the writings of Pau, Peter, and John. This is the way to have a son who has strong values - and values that will not be blown and tossed like the waves driven by the wind. Be a strong man - speak strong things - and rear strong sons!
0 Comments
The father of the righteous will greatly rejoice, And he who sires a wise son will be glad in him. Let your father and your mother be glad, And let her rejoice who gave birth to you. Proverbs 23:24-25
God has blessed my wife and I with 6 children, of which 2 of them are sons. Our testimony as a family is an interesting one because it involves being caught up in religious, church-y living - and then later being in relationship with a very merciful, loving God. Please bear with me, because all this actually relates to the proverb for today. Solomon tells us that the father of the righteous will greatly rejoice, and he who sires a wise son will be glad in him. At present I am the father of two sons who are righteous - and who are seeking to live their lives according to God's wisdom. Oh, by the way - I also greatly rejoice in God's goodness for giving me such sons. To write such things can be extremely dangerous, so let me explain what all this means - giving all the glory to God. I am a pastor. I have been one for some 20+ years. During that time God has been very gracious to me - showing me mercy extensively in the midst of a great deal of stupidity. There were times that I was so given to "the ministry" that I did not love my family as I should have loved them. I also was so caught up in trying to have a "great church" in the eyes of men - that I was a horrible example of what a man of God should be - not just to my family, but to the people of Calvary Chapel. A lot of this came crashing down when a biblical discipline situation arose in our fellowship - and spiritual carnage resulted. What I (and yes I emphasize I) had built came crashing down just like Jesus said it would in Matthew 7:27-28. This not only happened at the church, but my own sons were rejecting it as well. Then God broke me - wonderfully, graciously, mercifully broke me. I spent about 2 months weeping, confessing sin to my wife and my children - and to the church as well. It was during that time that I laid all my plans for me being a great pastor and preacher at the feet of Jesus - and decided I just wanted to love, know, and obey Him. God was so merciful in responding that the repentance and brokenness by drawing my two sons to Himself and making them righteous through faith in Jesus Christ. He slowly began to transform my sons, my family, and the fellowship He so graciously allowed me to continue to pastor. We are far from perfect - but as long as we seek Him and do what He says - things will go well. This Proverb says that the father of the righteous will greatly rejoice. That does not mean that the father rears his sons to be righteous in themselves - for that would only be self-righteousness. He rears his sons to see that the only way they can be righteous is to turn in repentance and faith to Jesus Christ. Having their righteousness in Him - they can begin to walk as godly men - looking to and trusting Him at all times. What the father seeks to do is to be sure that he has "wise" sons. Since we know that wisdom is seeing all things from God's perspective - and making choices according to that way of seeing things - this means that his boys learn to have a biblical worldview, and live according to God's will rather than their own. If a father sees this - he rejoices. That wonderful gift has been given to me two times over. It also has been given to me in spite of my early years of stupidity and self-driven living. The writer of Proverbs says to the sons that they should let their father and mother be glad - especially the mother who gave birth to them. Too many children spend their lives trying to please their parents by doing whatever they want them to do. That may seem like a contradiction to what I just said - but it is not. If a parent is wise in the way that they rear their child, they will make certain that their child knows that the most important thing in life is to live by God's will - not just by what their parents desire. Of course, this includes the commandment to honor and obey parents. But a wise mom and dad are certain to direct their child only to hear their voice as a precursor to listening to God's voice. The wise parent also knows that during their teen years their children need to transition from just listening to a parent - to listening to God and doing as He says. A child who remains dependent upon a parent throughout their lives will not be a wise child. They have to come to the point of starting their own family - and rearing another generation of kids who start by listening to their parents, and who later in life transfer that teachability to God's voice and the Scriptures. My wife and I have strived to do this with our children. We've failed as often as we've succeeded - with all successes being due to following God's counsel. But know this - it is not easy - and parenting is not for cowards. If you do this properly - your children will marry - and will leave the home. If we rear them to treasure the gospel and take seriously their responsiblity to God and to the world for proclaiming it - there is a good chance they may take seriously that command to go to all the nations. We've already watched three do this - and a fourth is probably on her way. That means as we rejoice, there is also a little bit of heart-ache as we send them to the ends of the earth - not knowing if they will ever return. But then again, what greater joy can we have as parents than to follow the example of God Himself, Who gave His Son away so that the nations might be saved? A foolish son is destruction to his father, And the contentions of a wife are a constant dripping. House and wealth are an inheritance from fathers, But a prudent wife is from the LORD. Proverbs 19:13-14
Two different kinds of homes are shown to us in this proverb - the first in verse 13, and the second in verse 14. These two different homes will make the difference between a life that is a joy - and one that is most likely pure drudgery. The first home has a son - a foolish son who is a destruction to his father. The word used here for fool is different than we are used to seeing. It is the Hebrew word "kestyl" and refers to one of several types of fools who are spoken of in Scripture. He is a fool, according to Ecclesiastes 4:5, 13 who is unable to live life in a successful, practical way. He is a fool who according to Proverbs 1:22, 32 who scoffs at the things of God and as a result has a lifestyle that is very self-destructive. Other passages refer to this fool as someone who is rash in his decision making - who pursue foolishness - and who will not have honor but will experience shame due to their decisions and lifestyle. The father of this fool watches his own life destroyed due to this son. The word for destruction here refers to destruction that comes because of a rejection of God and a rejection of God's ways and truth. The father's life is destroyed because of the consequences of his son's life wreaking havoc on his heart and most likely his finances. To look at an example of this we have to go no further than the story of the prodigal son. This son was a fool - and demanded half the estate of his father - who chose to give it to him. Even though this son eventually returned - in the time of his discipline and foolishness he consumed not only half of his father's estate with his ungodly lifestyle - he also consumed numerous hours of his father's concern and heartbroken intercession. Remember that his father was watching for him - longing for him to return from his godless choices and lifestyle. This passage also reminds us that the contentions of a wife are a constant dripping to a man as well. The picture painted for us by Solomon is that of a wife who is unhappy - and who poures out her unhappiness upon her husband in contentious attitudes and words. Fascinating is the definition of "madon" the Hebrew word for contention here. It refers to quarrels and disputes that cannot be stopped once they are set in motion. They are arguments that create barriers between people - usually caused by a person with a bad temper. Imagine the poor man who has this to look forward to each day of his life. He does not have a help-meet - but someone who tears him down every day when he comes home. Like a dripping leak in the ceiling or a faucet that drives you crazy with the drip, drip, drip sound that never stops - so this man has to deal with an ungrateful, unloving wife who creates tension and dissention in the home rather than an atmosphere of love and peace. Contrasted to this kind of home, we see in verse 14 the true wealth that God can bring to our lives. Where a house and wealth can be given to us in the inheritance from our fathers - there is something far more valuable that we should long to receive. I've watched as people have receieved a large inheritance from their parents. If gratefully received it can be a huge blessing to the family for generations to come. But without the second blessing that is mentioned here - entire families can be destroyed for multiple generations. Whereas we can receive an inheritance from our fathers, a prudent wife is a gift from God Himself. The prudent wife is one who is discerning and filled with godly insight. She acts wisely, having understanding and wisdom from which to make her decisions and guide the things that she does each day. She is intelligent - but with far more than just book-learning. She is intelligent in the things of the Lord - which allows her to bless her husband and children not just with her teaching, but with the example of her life 24 hours every day. Her wise prudence allows her to see what is coming - how choices will effect the future - and what choices will make for God's greatest blessing on her and her family. Truly the gift of this kind of woman in a man's wife is a gift from God. Whereas money can be good or bad for us - a prudent wife will be blessing at all times. Her influence on a home and on children and grandchildren will bless a family for multiple generations. When the Scriptures tell us that her worth is beyond gold, silver, and precious stones - it is not kidding us. When you have a prudent wife - you are being blessing with a fortune that will last long after the money and things in your life are rusted and dust. A man needs to look at these two verses and grasp wisdom. Wisdom means choosing eternal things - such as the blessing of your family for generations to come by submitting your "love life" fully into the hands of God. It means choosing a wife under His direction and with His values fully guiding your thinking. It may mean waiting - or turning away from a relationship with a young lady who looks good on the outside - but whose lack of discernment and godly wisdom will make her a serious liablilty to you and your family in the future. The wise man surrenders himself to God in every area - including the choice of a future wife. Remember you can have a constant dripping and a destructive son - or a purdent wife whose worth cannot be measured in gold, silver, and precious stones. The choice is yours - choose wisely! Bind them continually on your heart; Tie them around your neck. When you walk about, they will guide you; When you sleep, they will watch over you; And when you awake, they will talk to you. Proverbs 6:21-22
There is such a blessing that comes from the teaching of Godly parents. They can bless us so much - if - we do not blow it by not taking what they say to us seriously. This is why Solomon told us in this proverb that we need to take these things and bind them on our hearts and tie them around our necks. This admonition to keep these teachings and truths on our heart and around our neck are both pictures of giving them a high place in our lives. This same admonition is given in Proverbs 1:8 about a parent's teaching - as well as in Proverbs 3:3 where it speaks about what we should do with kindness and truth in our lives. There are some things that we need to value as highly as possible. One of those things is the teaching of a godly father and mother. We are told in verse 22 that if we do this we will have a protection service that will function in our lives. We are told first that as we walk about these things will guide us. Consider how often you would be guided if you took the advice of a very godly set of parents. I can think of at least several serious disasters and problems I would not have if I had followed my father's advice on some financial matters. This is why, as parents, we need to be sure to teach our children the Scriptures and use them as the wisdom that we pass on to them. The wisdom of God's Word would guide our children everywhere that they go! The second blessing mentioned here is that as we sleep, these teachings and truths will watch over us. The word for "watch over" here is the Hebrew word "shamar" which means to watch over so as to protect. Whether you realize it or not, decisions you make are working either for or against you even as you sleep. Consider a financial decision to make a foolish investment. This investment is working even when you are asleep either to earn money or to watch it drop in value. In much the same way, decisions for godliness are working for us - even as we sleep. Following the godly advice of our parents will be working for us even as we are sleeping in our beds. Associations with others that might harm us - stopped by following godly advice. Decisions to invest in education - in a godly work ethic - to marry the right person - to live for the things of the Lord - all working marvelously for us every day we are alives. The final blessing mentioned here is that as we wake up - these things will be speaking to us. I remember a friend who has a godly mother who said to me that some of the things she hears that bless her - usually come in the sound of her mother's voice in her head. That is the value of what a parent teaches to a child when they take the time to teach them the Word of God. There are times we will hear them at a crossroads decision - and their counsel will be sweet to us. That is why we need to value you it like we would value some of our most prize possessions. Just a note as we come to the close of this particular proverb. As this proverb is true of a parent's teaching - it is even more true about the teaching and training of our heavenly father. His Word will bless us in the very same way - except with eternal blessings. How we need to heed Colossians and let that Word dwell "RICHLY" in our hearts. If we do - we will have God's Word lead us, watch over us, and speak to us all day long. What a blessing! My son, observe the commandment of your father And do not forsake the teaching of your mother; Proverbs 6:20
How does a father and a mother work together to rear their children for the Lord? That is a good question to ask, and one that is often overlooked as we kind of stumble along in the paths of parenthood. But believe it or not, the book of Proverbs has a proverb that instructs us on this matter - and does so very well. We would be wise to listen to this counsel - and begin to pattern our parenting upon its precepts. Here in Proverbs 6:20, we have an interesting statement made that gives a role to both the father and the mother in giving wisdom to their children. The first thing we read here is that a son should observe the commandment of his father. Observe here is the Hebrew word "natsar" which means to watch, to guard, or to keep. The word had several uses, but came to us from the military world where the idea of watching was prominent. When a soldier was put on watch - it was his duty to scan the horizon and be ready at an instant to warn the troops of a sneak attack - or a full scale assault. Were he to fall asleep at his post - the entire regiment would be at risk of being overrun and destroyed. The word was then carried over into the idea of ehtics and watchfulness over God's or other's commands. Here is spoke of a watchfulness for the purpose of being faithful to the command - as well as an ethical watch over one's own behavior so that the command was carried out with careful obedience. The son is called to have this kind of watching when it came to his father's commandments. As you can imagine, the word "commandments" is the normal word "mitsvah" which is the most common word for a commandment or a statute given to someone. It is the word used of the 10 commandments - and the same word used most often to speak of God's law. It is also part of the word for "barmitzvah" that speaks of the ceremony at age 13 when a Jewish boy was considered a man. He was considered such because he was taking on the full responsibility of the Law of God. Barmitzvah literally means, "son of the law" or "son of the commandments." The father calls his son to obey the commandments that he gives him. If a man is wise - he will make his commandments very similar to those God gives us. Flood a boy with too many commandments and he will lose heart trying to remember and keep all of them. But when we give a child limitations and wise standards by which to live - he will be far more secure. Just a warning though to the father who thinks that he can "christianize" his kids by the way he rears them. The Law was meant to show us that we are sinners. No matter how wonderfully you rear your children, they will still have to come to Christ to be saved and redeemed from their sinful, rebellious ways. Yet, a wise man will knows the value of setting godly standards for his children. A son would also be wise - very wise if he takes his father's commandments and seeks to govern his behavior by them. Most young people (and by the way I definitely include myself in my younger years) have a basic disdain for their parents commandments. That is a perfect way of seeing how sin and how the fall have affected our lives. Wisdom tells us that those older than us are also usually wiser than us. The only time a child can say that he is as wise as his elders is when he loves God's Word and seeks to know it with great passion. Then Psalm 119 makes a promise that God's Word makes him wiser even than his elders. (Just a brief word of wisdom though - if you do know the Word very well - you will also approach your elders with it with humility and grace - not with arrogance and a sense of superiority - that kind of attitude pretty much shows that you've descended back into foolishness again.) The mother's role is given next. This verse says to us that the son also should not forsake the teaching of his mother. The word forsake means just that - to forsake or to reject something. Here it refers to the "teaching" of his mother. The word "teaching" here is the Hebrew word, "torah." It meant something that was taught - but more along the lines of giving specific instruction or direction to someone. So we see an interesting thing here. The father gives the basic commands to his son, but the mother then works with him to see how they are applied to everyday situations and in everyday life. She takes the basic law given by the dad - and adds additional instruction and help in seeing how to walk in those commands each day. Since the father usually has to go to work and be gone throughout much of the day, the mother then takes over the work of instructing and helping the sons and daughters grasp and understand how it is the father desires for them to live. She makes his commandments into practical choices and works hard to teach those choices to the children. What is fascinating to me as I look at this verse is that this is how Jewish religion is set up. They have the Law (mitzvah) which is given by God the Father. They also have the instruction (the torah) which is given by the rabbis who teach the Law to the people. They took this very concept and used it to set up their entire teaching system that they use with their people. This works wonderfully - until the rabbis begin to have their teaching pervert the actual Law upon which it was based. This is true also in families where mother and father are not on the same page in rearing their children. Either the dad or mom is too strict - or too lenient, and the other decides to modify what they view as an unrealistic view by changing things themselves. This leads to chaos in the child's mind - and the unique ability to play one parent against the other. Regardless - the result is usually bad. The wise son is the one who listens well to his parents - and who takes both the command of the dad - and the teaching of the mom - and uses it to make wise decisions in life. May we be so blessed as to have fathers that will lead wisely and godly - moms that will teach according to his commandments - and children who in turn will know the right way to walk because they have heard it from their parents. The eye that mocks a father And scorns a mother, The ravens of the valley will pick it out, And the young eagles will eat it. Proverbs 30:17
This proverb is one of those that seems a little harsh when you first read it - especially if you've ever been disrespectful to your parents. Your average kid might say, "You mean to say that if I scorn my parents, I'm doomed to have scavenger birds peck my eye out and eat it?" Since we know that not every rebellious child and teenager has had his eyes destroyed by a flock of ravens and eagles - we know that this passage has more to teach us than just a scary warning that probably would not work on kids anyway. But just what is this proverb trying to show us? The key comes in understanding why a bird - especially a scavenger would have any interest in an animal's eyes. You see both of the birds mentioned in this passage are scavengers. That means that they both eat dead things. But one practice that ravens have as they approach carrion is that they need to be sure it is dead. That can mean the difference in having a meal and being one to the raven. Therefore when a raven suspects an animal to be dead - he goes straight for the eye. The raven lands near the animal and sees if the animal makes any movements. Then when the raven detects that things are clear for the most part - he subjects the animal to the ultimate test as to whether it is alive or dead. He pecks at the animal's eye. If an animal does not move to protect the eye, it is dead. As the raven picks out the eye of the animal - it assures him that the animal is dead. Often early in the meal that follows, a larger predator - which is where the young eagle comes in - will arrive and take over the meal from the raven, who wisely knows when he is outmatched. Now, let's take what we've learned from nature - and apply it to what is said in this passage. When a young person feels his oats enough to begin mocking his own father and mother it is a very dangerous sign. The reference to the raven and the young eagle is not a direct threat - but rather a reminder. He is spiritually dead. This is not so much a threat of future aviary retribution - but of the spiritual reality of where this young man or woman is. God promises us that the one who honors his mother and father will live long on the earth. Great blessing is in store for the child who learns about respect, honor, and submission in subjection to his parents. These are vital lessons to learn if he or she is going to be successful in life - and after life is over. These come through properly relating to one's parents. If we don't learn them in the home - we will face learning them out in the world where the cost to learn them is far higher than it is with mom and dad. One last thing that we need to note here is that we are not talking about open rebellion here - but the "eye" that mocks father and mother. This is as much a look as it is an action. I remember my mother telling me not to look at her in that tone of voice. It was a little bit of a joke - but not really. She knew, and so did my father, when my eyes were revealing what was really going on in my heart. The eyes are the window to the soul - and reveal much of what is truly going on in our hearts. Thus we need to be careful to not only watch our words concerning our parents, but also the way our eyes function as well. Quite often we might be obeying in our outward members - but our eyes reveal another story altogether. Remember then, that when the scavengers come looking for the dead - they come looking for those who are dead in their eyes. When a wise man seeks to determine whether someone is spiritually alive or dead - he can learn much in how a person treats their parents. I have directed you in the way of wisdom; I have led you in upright paths. 12 When you walk, your steps will not be impeded; And if you run, you will not stumble. Proverbs 4:11-12
Fathers, how well have you led and directed your sons? Would you be able to say what we have read here in Proverbs today? Would you be able to tell your sons that if they walk in your ways, they would live a godly life - one that would not hinder them from growing spiritually and one free from the stumbling blocks that often trip us up in life? The father here who is instructing his son tells him very plainly that he has directed him in a lifestyle that values wisdom. The word for "directed" is a very visual word - describing an arrow that has been shot straight. The way that fathers are to shoot their sons into this world is on a path that highly values wisdom and God's ways. I love that he uses the phrase, "the way of wisdom." Way is the Hebrew word "derek" which refers to a lifestyle - a long journey - a manner of living. The father taught in such a way that wisdom became a lifestyle, not just a series of choices every now and then. This is how we are to educate our children. I believe in education - but not as an end in itself. Education or the acquiring of information and learning - is just a stepping stone to a greater goal. We should educate our children (and everyone for that matter) so that they take the information they receive and use it to walk in wisdom and understanding in their lives. That is how this father taught his son - and what his goal was in the end. The second thing he says to his son is that he also led him in upright paths. Again we see a word here, paths, that tells us that this father led with a view toward having his son learn a pathway. This word refers to a track or a course. The father, by his example - led his son to know the track that leads to wisdom and godliness. He refers to it as an "upright" path. In Proverbs 2:13 the father speaks to his son about staying on the straight path - and not taking the crooked one. This upright path is one that is straight, godly, and filled with what is right. The dad took the time to teach his son godly, holy ways. He did so with such consistency in his life that his son learned these ways - not just from instruction alone. He "led" his son in these paths - meaning that he walked in front of his son - leading the way all throughout his life. The son knew godliness not just by precept, but by example. Here is the beauty of teaching and leading our sons in this manner. The father, in verse 12, now tells his son that there are wonderul rewards or walking in this way. The first benefit is that when he walks, this son will not be impeded. The word here is "yatsar" and it means to be in distress or frustrated. The word indicates a frustrated anxiety in situations. The idea therefore is that the son will not face impediments that will make him filled with anxiety and frustration. This seems like a wonderful promise. But can we truly walk throughout our lives without being frustrated? That seems a little more than we can swallow, being those who have frequently experienced varying levels of frustration and anxiety in life. God's promise here is not a lack of frustrating situations, but rather that when we walk, our steps will not be walked out in frustration. This God provides by teaching us wisdom - seeing life as He sees it. When we do this, we will begin to see all things as beneficial to us - even if they seem bad at the outset. We will find even the most difficult of moments being used by God for our good. We learn to have the same patience that our Father God has as we deal with people. Seeing life as He does makes us so much less frustrate-able. Knowing that all things work together for our good - as we are being conformed to the image and character of Jesus - makes life so very livable. The second benefit the father tells his son that wisdom will bring is that when it comes time to run, he will not stumble. The word for "run" used here had pretty specific contexts. Men ran in battle. Men ran to the defense. Men ran to bring important messages to others. Fathers, we need to teach our sons that there are times they need to run. But we also need to train them so that when it is time to run - to battle the enemy - to defend their family, their friends, the church, their freedom - to bring the message of the gospel and of godliness - that they will not trip and fall because they are not ready. The idea here of stumbling always carried with it that one stumbled either because he was weak or because he had a stumbling block before him. This is where an education of wisdom - to help a young man establish a lifestyle is so vital. Without it he will develop habits and choices that will put stumbling blocks before him. Without it he will be weak when he needs to be strong. Without it he will fall inevitably into the two traps of manhood. He will either become a man who is domineering who lacks a servant's heart toward his wie and children - or - he will fall into passivity and not have the strength o character to lead his family and lead in situations where the world around him desperately needs a man to step up and be a man. Fathers, an awesome task has been set before us. We are to train the next generation of men. That may seem like a daunting task - but it is one that God promises to help us and give us great grace to accomplish. There is no one, dad, who can take your place in this effort. You will be THE most effective teacher for your sons in this endeavor. Do it with all your hearts - because the blessing it will bring to your grandchildren and the world in which your son will live will be immeasurable. And beyond all this, the glory that will be brought to God for the ways that His wisdom will be displayed in your son's life and family - will adorn the gospel and the Word of God in a way that is desperately needed in our generation. Be wise, my son, and make my heart glad, That I may reply to him who reproaches me. Proverbs 27:11
When we have wise sons it is a joy to our hearts as fathers. That is why it is so vital that the current generation of fathers take on the task of rearing a generation of sons who reject this present evil world and its ways and choose instead to live according to the wisdom God offers to us in the Scriptures. What I think we have here is the frustrated cry of a father. He is frustrated because he desires for his son to be wise - yet, he is facing criticism and reproach because he is not. It may be the cry of a father who has seen men before him - godly men in their own right - and yet they were subject to reproach because of the character and choices of their sons after them. The father may have been a man of God - a man of great godly character and actions. He may have been a leader - an example himself. The problem is that his son does not walk in the same way. Think about Samuel the prophet for a moment in this light. He was a man of God - unparalleled in how he served God with all his heart. Yet the one thing that caused the downfall of his ministry - was the way that his sons lived. At the close of his life the people of Israel asked for a king. They asked, not because Samuel was inadequate as a prophet. They asked because by their own admission, Samuel's sons did not walk in his ways. Samuel, as godly as he was - had not learned the lesson of Eli's lack of godly fathering of his sons. Eli's sons were ungodly - and their actions led to the people not being led by godly men. Now, Samuel, after seeing God bring Israel back to Himself - now watched as they rejected the Lord as king over them - because they would have to trust Samuel's sons to lead them after Samuel's death. This they did not want - because Samuel's sons were not men of God. The cry of a godly father who is reproached when his sons do not walk in his ways - is that they would be wise and godly. But as we look back on much of biblical history - it is one littered with godly men whose very sons did not follow in their daddy's footsteps. So what are we to learn here from this passage about wisdom? Fathers, please hear me for a few moments here. You may have a legacy in your own actions that blows everyone away - but it will mean little to you later in life if your sons do not walk in your ways. God calls us as fathers to love our children by rearing them to walk with Him. That is a task that we cannot ignore - no matter how successful we are. It will come to haunt us - as it did Samuel, as it did Solomon, as it did Hezekiah. These men were all godly in their own right - but their sons did not walk in their ways. In all three cases, the legacy of these men was not carried on through their sons. They turned from following the Lord and the result was pretty disastrous for them - and for the people whom they were supposed to lead. Wisdom is found in a father who leads and teaches his son to walk wisely. He does so as one of the most important things he can possibly do in life. The detriment to our society and the church within it cannot be possibly be calculated because our sons often do not walk in our ways. Men leave carnage behind them when they do not walk with God. God wants men to lead in spiritual matters - but when they don't - or sadly can't - what they leave behind is much reason for us to reproach their fathers for not making as an ultimate priority the responsibility to bring up godly sons after them. Listen, my son, and be wise, And direct your heart in the way. Proverbs 23:19
There are some very serious consequences for those who become heavy drinkers or gluttonous eaters. These are things that we don't like to deal with today - because they tend to get a little personal when we confront them. Nevertheless, these things are not good for us, and they will rob us of the blessings of a good and prosperous life. Contrary to the nanny state that is trying to change people's behavior by legislation and shaming, God's Word takes a different approach. First of all, we see that the things that are being said are said from the mouth of a father. These are matters that the state are not to fix - they were meant to be addressed in the course of living within a godly home. The reason that these things are epidemic in our day is because of the rampant lack of godly homes. There are no longer fathers who take the time to regularly teach and train their sons to be godly men. There are also no longer those in our society that will know the Word in a way that will move them to impart wisdom to their children. The father here speaks to his son and lets him know from the start that the motivation for his comments is that his son would be wise. He is saying to his boy, if you are wise, you will avoid these kinds of lifestyle choices. Then he lets his son know that if he rejects such wisdom - there will be consequences. He does not seek to deliver his son from the consequences except a warning of what is to come. He is not wanting to just modify his son's behavior. He is seeking to help his son on heart issues. He says, "Direct your heart in the way!" Our current legislative overreach wants to modify behavior by taxing certain behaviors heavier - or trying to outlaw them altogether. They seek to stop smoking this way - or they try to so stigmatize smoking that people will stop out of shame. What this has led to is people who hold fast to their smoking - but not have to pay far more to do so. The sad thing is that in the end, the government (who is constantly in search of more money to spend) receives greater tax because of this behavior. This makes it to where they almost don't want to have smoking stop - because then their revenue stream will dry up and go away. Just addressing the outward behavior will do little or nothing to stop the problem. This father addresses the heart. He wants his son to be wise - and a wise man takes the time to direct his own heart into a way that does not dishonor God. He will direct his heart into ways that are not destructive to himself. Instead he will direct his heart into "THE" way. What is "THE" way? It is the way of the Lord. It is a way that puts great value on bringing glory and honor and praise to Him. It is a way that values the Word of God - and values the lifestyle that comes from honoring and obeying the Word of God. This is what the father wants - and it is a wise thing that he is seeking! Fathers, let's give us merely trying to change our son's behavior with poor motivators. Threats and harsh punishments will probably not turn the hearts of our sons to the right way. Let us speak the truth to our children, but at the same time aim for the heart. What we want is to see them choose wise paths - and heart-motivated change. May God give us the wisdom to speak to them this way - and then they will be blessed - not just with good behavior, but a good heart that motivates that behavior for a lifetime. Check tomorrow's post as we continue through the next several verses to see how the father uses wisdom - and an understanding of the biblical consequences that follow our actions. My son, if sinners entice you, Do not consent. Proverbs 1:10
Here we are given an inside seat to a spectacle that takes place every day. This event is when a fool or group of fools approach a person to entice him to join with them in their ungodly schemes. This is something we need to see because as Solomon tells us in Ecclesiastes, there really is nothing new under the son. Men have tried to get others to join with their gang to do mischief for numerous generations. The lies are pretty much unchanged - and yet they are good to know ahead of time so that we are not taken in by the offers of fools whose only true promise is to get us into serious trouble before everything is over. How young people need to read these words and profit from rejecting them ahead of time. Here a father speaks to his son to warn him against such foolish company - and against their foolish offers to "cut him in on the action." His first instructive comment is to refer to those who do such things as "sinners." What is instructive about this word is the comment made by Zhodiates that this word is used, "to describe those who, by their actions, are under the wrath and judgment of God and face ultimate destruction." In Psalm 104:35 we are told that these folks will be consumed from the earth - and in Isaiah 1:28 that they will be crushed and will come to their end by the hand of God. The father warns that these people will come to "entice" them. They will come with words to try to allure, persuade, and deceive. They want to convince this young man to join with them as they plan to do their evil deeds. This may sound all melodramatic to some who read this - but that is only because the world has done a good job of mocking this kind of talk. They do so by overdramatizing the father or the spiritual guide - making him sound stupid when he warns of such things. Their effectiveness has only dulled the minds of our children to those who truly will come to them with such wicked counsel. In the end they only make it easier for the criminal and harder for the parent or mentor. This father is doing a good thing in warning his son about this kind of interview. His advice to his son is not to consent. In the end the boy is going to have to make a decision on his own. Eventually every child will leave the home and will face temptation to do evil. If we do not instruct them - they will face this without godly counsel on their side. This father does an admirable job of letting his son hear the enticing words ahead of time. But the father does so with additional commentary explaining to his son just where such counsel will lead. Hey dad, let me ask you a question. Are you preparing your son to face these things? Are you taking the time to let him hear the kind of things he is going to be told - and then put them into the context of where they will take him? There is a kind of Christian parenting that is going on today that does not think kids should be exposed to anything that is remotely wrong. I agree with this when it comes to exposing them to such things and encouraging them to do them. But what this godly father is doing is exposing his son to the reality of what wicked men will say to him one day. He is letting his son know the arguments - the offers - the lies that will be told to him. Then he is taking those statements and dismantling them before his son. He does so by showing his son where such lies will lead him. The warning his boy receives is a wise one - and one that we would do well to teach to our own children as well. When we think that placing them into a world without any form of tempation of proposed evil will protect them - we may be deceiving ourselves. One day they won't be with us - and an evil man will approach with his slick lies. What will they do then? Will they know how to stand and resist the lies? Maybe . . . maybe not. The only way we can prepare them for such a day is to teach them by exposing them to what will be said - as well as the sure judgment and destruction that comes with the lifestyle that will result. |
Proverb a DayEach day, we'll take a look at a verse from the chapter of Proverbs for the day. Our hope is to gain wisdom each day - and from that wisdom - to have understanding to make godly decisions in the throes of everyday life. Thank you for visiting our website! Everything on this site is offered for free. If, however, you would like to make a donation to help pay for its continued presence on the internet, you can do that by clicking here. The only thing we ask is that you give first to the local church you attend. Thank you!
Archives
August 2018
Copyright 2024 Calvary Chapel Jonesboro | all rights reserved |