Take his garment when he becomes surety for a stranger; And for an adulterous woman hold him in pledge. Proverbs 27:13
There are just plain dumb decisions that are made in life. At times when we make these stupid decisions, God in His mercy will deliver us from the consequences. If this happens, do not think God approves your actions - He is just showing amazing mercy to you in the midst of them. But there are some decisions God decides to allow us to face - with the full measure of the consequences being given to us. This proverb tells us about two of them. The first has to do with a man acting foolish financially. When someone becomes surety for a stranger, that is a very foolish thing to do. This proverb tells us to even take a man's garment when this happens. Just as a reminder, surety is when we co-sign a loan - or guarantee another person's debt. If they default on the loan - we are on the hook for what they owe. The reason this is so foolish here is because someone is doing this for a stranger. He doesn't know the man - and is not related to him. He is just guaranteeing a loan for someone he does not know. He does not have a clue as to his character or his integrity - he just lays down his money to guarantee this man's borrowing. Surety is discouraged for anyone - but this should be a no-brainer when it comes to a stranger. With a family member of friend, we at least have a sense of their character and whether they will be likely to repay the loan. But a stranger - we know nothing about him. Thus, Solomon tells us to take this man's clothes when the loan defaults. This is something that hopefully will teach him a lesson about guaranteeing the loans of others - especially those he does not even know. The second scenario is when a man hires a prostitute for sex - and offers her a pledge as payment. Adultery is a very foolish sin - but to offer someone our name as pledge is really foolish to another level. Amazing as it may seem, this is what Judah did when he hired his daughter-in-law Tamar as a prostitute. Tamar was not being a harlot. She was simply desiring that Judah's family line fulfill their duty in raising up sons for the deceased. When Judah did not have the money in hand to pay her - she asked for his seal and his cords. These were things by which a man could be known if they were seen. This was not wise for him - but it gave her the proof she needed when her adulterous father-in-law wanted to have her stoned for playing the harlot. When Judah saw his own seal and cords, he was humiliated and withdrew his call for her death. No one wants to be humiliated by their sin. But there are times when it is a far better thing to be humiliated and learn than to escape humiliation and continue in sin. God is amazing how He delivers us from sin and from the world around us. May God give us grace to embrace that deliverance - and truly be wise.
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"For my husband is not at home, He has gone on a long journey; He has taken a bag of money with him, At the full moon he will come home." Proverbs 7:19-20
Once the adulteress has caught the fool in the trap of his own ungodly sexual desires - she then informs him of his soon-to-be-committed adultery. At this point, the man is so entrapped, that he is no longer considering sin - but the ability to not get caught. She says to him that her husband is not at home - but is gone on a long journey. Evidently her marriage means nothing to her. Long gone are the words of her covenant to God - or any real love for her husband. Instead she is interested in her next sexual escapade or conquest. Her words betray her husband - and also betray that she cares nothing for her own spiritual condition, or that of her sexual prey. Her focus is on neither of them getting caught - in this world. In verse 19 she even knows the approximate time he is coming home. Therefore she can sin unfettered until that time. She even uses her treachery to lure the fool in closer. She is utterly blind to the fact that God sees all this - and they are caught - NOW! Think for a moment of David. He thought no one saw him lusting for Bathsheba on his rooftop. He thought that only a few knew of her coming to his chambers - and none of them actually knew if they committed adultery. Then, when she became pregnant, he thought that no one knew of his treachery of bringing Uriah from the midst of a battle to cover his tracks. When that did not work, he thought only a few knew of his plan to kill Uriah - and try to legitimize his adultery by marrying his widow after murdering him with an enemy army. But the fact was David was caught the moment he sinned in his heart. It was along the way that more people knew - and if you understand the nature of gossip - far more knew than he thought. Covering our sin does not work. David said after his sin that he who covers his sins will not prosper. He spoke of how he suffered when he hid his sin - how the work of the Holy Spirit convicting him and sapping his very strength as he tried to keep things hidden was strong. Sin will try to deceive us of its very existance in our lives. It will tell us that we have NOT sinned. It will tell us that we are FINE. But all along the way are lies. The wise man is the one who knows that trying to hide sin is the most foolish act in which a person can engage. God is omniscient and sovereign - that is absolute fact. This means that there is nothing we can hide from Him - even for a second. It also means that all our attempts to maintain our sin are superceded by His sovereignty. Man may plan his steps - but God ordains his way. While that does not mean that God makes us sin - it does mean that His discipline WILL prevail when we do - no matter what we think we are doing to stop it. "Come, let us drink our fill of love until morning; Let us delight ourselves with caresses. Proverbs 7:18
As we continue our look at overcoming sexual temptation, we come to the direct statement of the harlot. We need to look at this statement to see the deception and the encouragement of sin in it. She makes the fool an offer of sex - but the way she states it is having his fill of love until the morning. The word she uses for love here is the one that is usually used in the Hebrew for "lover." But what she offers is not love in the truest sense. She offers a fullness of love - at least until the morning. She offers fullness of love - at least until her husband gets home - or she finds someone else to be her sexual dupe. But all the fool hears is that he has a lover for the evening. That is the problem with sexual temptation - it offers an immediate pleasure - but says nothing of the long-term cost. Sexual tempation (and actually any temptation for that matter) always focuses on immediate gratification. Our flesh wants immediate gratification - and calls out for it every day we live. But immediate gratification may leave a wake of incredible destruction. Therefore, the more we allow oursevles to be deceived into thinking there are no consequences for our actions - the more likely we are going to fall for the lies being fed to us. The adulteress says that a night of wonderful love-making awaits us. But let's be perfectly honest about this. That promise is for about 10 to 15 minutes. Drinking our fill of love until morning is a euphamism for little more than 30 minutes of our time. The destruction had in that brief period of time - lasts far longer - and I would submit the pain involved is far worse than the intensity of the pleasure promised. I've walked with people through divorce proceedings that last months. I've walked with men who made this fatal mistake - and even years later they were still paying a price when their wives struggled with trusting them when they were late from work. But sin never talks to us in these terms - sin only speaks of the "now" moment of pleasure. Wisdom considers the moments after - the days after - the months and years after. Delighting oursevles with caresses is another call to live for our flesh, and the adulteress uses it craftily. The word "delight" here is interesting. It means to rejoice in something - finding pleasure in it - and delighting in pleasure by expressing that pleasure above all other things. What is interesting about this word is that the Bible uses it of the pleasure that is found in the sexual relationship in marriage. God actually blesses this delight in pleasure - but He does so with the boundaries of marriage fully in place. We read in multiple places in the Bible that God fully desires for us to experience the joy of married sexual love. God did not give us sexual organs, desires, and the ability to feel pleasure only to forbid it. But He knows that when we do so outside the bounds of a committed marriage relationship, it will turn destructive. Just delighting ourselves with caresses can lead to the idea of multiple sexual partners - which we know leads to sexually transmitted diseases. It leads to a shallow love based on physical attraction and physical pleasure alone. In its more perverted forms - this leads to homosexualtiy - and in its worst forms to things like incest and rape. Living for the physical pleasure of anything alone will lead to a complete abandonment of wisdom. Sins like gluttony, drunkenness, and drug abuse are all ways that we start with a desire for the physical pleasure of something alone. They all end in a bondage to sin that is very difficult to break. The call to sexual temptation is a call to live for our flesh - and for a rejoicing in pleasure alone. It does not think at all beyond the moment - and misses altogether the bondage that awaits in the future. The fool does not think ahead - he only thinks of now. He wants his pleasure now and is deaf to any consequences that await him. The way to defeat sexual temptation is to use something other than your physical organs to make your decisions. It is to use God's Word as wisdom guiding your mind as you encounter various things - various people in life. That way you do not wind up a slave to your senses. Biblically Romans 6 reminds us that in life we are going to be either a slave to sin or a slave to righteousness. Sin will destroy us. The wise man submits himself to God - to His Word - and to a life that promises pleasure and blessing beyond the next 30 minutes. "I have spread my couch with coverings, With colored linens of Egypt. I have sprinkled my bed With myrrh, aloes and cinnamon. Come, let us drink our fill of love until morning; Let us delight ourselves with caresses. Proverbs 7:16-18
Yesterday we took a first look at overcoming sexual immorality by understanding the way that the enemy will attack us in this area. We saw that selfishness and ego are two weak points where we can be attacked effectively if we are not careful. Today, we will continue to look at overcoming sexual immorality in our lives. The adulterous woman continues speaking to the fool whom she is enticing with promises of a night he will never forget. Having found "HIM" she then continues to entice him with what she has prepared for their night of passion. Brothers, we need to know that the longer we allow this woman to talk to us - the more likely we are to be caught in her web. This is something that seems strange to those who are looking from the outside in on this temptation. We might find ourselves wanting to scream and yell at this man - warning him of what is about to happen. The problem is that he is all but deaf to those warnings. Having ignored the warnings of the Holy Spirit earlier - he is a sitting duck for this kind of stuff. She speaks of how she has covered her couch with special linens - then speaks of how she has also sprinkled her bed with fragrant enticing smells and things that will heighten their sexual pleasure. Let me say men, that if we have not turned and run by this point - we are most likely caught. This man is listening with his sex drive by now - and when he has come to that point - he is deaf to anything else. The enticements are too much for him. He will most likely follow at this point. She is making here case first appealing to his ego - and now to his senses of sight and smell. Note though that at no time is his spirit being addressed. This is enticement that is apart from the working of the Holy Spirit. It is based solely in his flesh and his earthly appetites. That is why he needs to be so careful NOT to let things get to this point. What could this man have done to avoid this scenario - to not have gotten down the road this far? First, we need to cultivate a good relationship with our wives. Men, if you are not talking with your wife - you are making yourself vulnerable. If you see that you are NOT talking to her - or the conversation has dulled or gone silent - take great alarm over it! Your ability to talk to your wife about anything and everything is a safeguard to you! It will prevent you from falling into the second trap - talking too much with another woman. Second, you do NOT need to cultivate a relationship with other women. If you have an encounter conversationally with another woman that you would even hesitate to share with your wife, you should be warned - you are headed for dangerous territory. Too many men put themselves in vulnerable positions with another woman because they talk with them - and don't share that conversation with their wives. And - if the talk ever takes an uncomfortable turn - one that is too intimate - RUN! You should run to your wife and reveal that immediately - and ask her advice on what to do. Then you should follow it. Many adulterous affairs would have been nipped in the bud if the husband had only avoided any kind of talk that even remotely made him uncomfortable with another woman. The third thing relates to the second very closely. In the office and at work - keep your relationships and conversations with women on a professional level only. Do NOT go outside these boundaries. It may be uncomfortable to say it - but say it anyway. Your relationship with this woman at work needs to remain professional. Refer her to someone else than you for such conversations and such advice. Opening up such areas can only lead to problems and conflict. She works for you - or you for her - and this does not include a shoulder to cry on when her relationships are having problems. Do not be rude - but make it clear that you are uncomfortable talking about such things. You can even refer her to your wife if she is comfortable with that role - but YOU do not need to go there. The only way to avoid having another woman talk to you this way (sexually)is to make sure that the only woman who feels comfortable doing so is your wife. This man would have been wise to do these things - but since he did not - he is in the lair of the wicked one - and about to be caught in a horrible trap. The time to know of such traps is long before you step into them. Now, let me address one last trap we tend to step into too often. It is the trap of having these things done via the media. What I refer to is movies and television. Most of us would never think of looking into another person's bedroom - and their sex life. That would involve being a peeping-tom. But the fact is that we are ushered into the bedrooms of dozens of couples on a regular basis through film and television. Voyeurism takes place via these mediums every day. We watch a television program or see a movie where these kind of things are played out right before our eyes. We see that sexy woman or hunky guy say all the perfect things - do all the perfect things - and enter into a night of ecstasy (or at least implied ecstasy). We watch romantic movies where the actors are coached into saying the perfect thing in the perfect situation. Then we slouch into our couches wondering why the spark is gone in our own relationship. We are being coached as well by the wicked one. Coached into thinking that our wife or husband is not enough. They don't talk to me or treat me like that. They don't look like that. They don't work out the perfect scenario like that. And before we know it we've allowed our audio-visual voyeurism to make us discontent with our spouse. Then we spend our thoughts dreaming of that perfect situation - and of course - it involves someone who kind-of looks like that person we saw on TV or in the movie. Maybe it is that person with whom we are fantasizing having a romantic episode. Whatever the situation, we're caught - the trap has sprung - and we are much more susceptible now. Careful saints - the temptations and the wiles of the evil one are very subtle. He attacks in a myriad of ways - and his goal is to get to our minds and hearts. There he can plant an idea - a concept - a way of thinking that is opposed to the Scriptures. When he has done that - he has set up a beachhead from which to attack further into our lives. That is why we need to remember what the Scriptures teach concerning our marriages - concerning our wives - and concerning our sexuality. These are matters where to give an inch may mean later finding that the enemy has moved inward into our thinking and reasoning a mile. Reserve ALL such talk and thinking for your wife and your wife alone. That is wisdom. "Therefore I have come out to meet you, To seek your presence earnestly, and I have found you." Proverbs 7:15
Here are the enticements of the adulterous woman. These are the words that she uses to bring a man into her trap - which is her bedroom. Most men do not view a bedroom as a trap. Unfortunately, men tend to view the bedroom as a place of pleasure - and do not see that the difference between pleasure and pain - between a paradise and a pathway to hell is the status of the woman with whom they are having their pleasure at the moment. Guys, I want to be brutally honest with you for the next couple of days. We are going to follow this text for that length of time. This is an area where we are being decimated in the church today. We must open our eyes and begin to discern between the bedroom as a trap and as a treasure. The difference is in one term alone. Are we there with our wives as a holy place - where the Scriptures describe it as the "marriage bed" which it goes on to say is holy - or - are we being duped into thinking that God will in any way bless the bedroom beyond the relationship of marriage. Too often we are the dupes rather than the discerning. We listen to the siren song of the adulteress and do not heed the warning siren of the Holy Spirit to which we are deaf when we succumb to lust - or worse - encourage it in our lives. Please read today's passage and commentary with great discernment - because we, as a gender, must begin to walk in discernment as we walk through this world. Verse 15 reveals to us the secret weapon of the adulteress. It is the ego of a man - and how easily it can be manipulated. Look at what the adulteress says to this foolish man. After making him think that she is right with God (see Prov 7:14 for her religious comments) - she then aims straight for his ego. "Therefore I have come out to meet YOU. To seek YOUR presence earnestly, and I have found YOU." (emphasis mine) Oh, how foolish men love to be made much of by others - especially by a beautiful woman. This reveals to us a secret sin in this man's heart - that of being thought of romantically or sexually by a woman (even if it is a woman other than his wife). And at this point she has set her talons into his flesh. She has begun to hook him with this talk that strokes his deceived ego. Guys this is where we need to be brutally honest with one another. Biblically, God tells us that our desire is to be for our wives. Proverbs 5:17 says that we should be exhilarated with her love - focusing on her sexually. If we are not careful this present world and its sexual insanity will infect us. It is all around us each and every day. The world system is crazed with talk and with innuendo about sex. That is why we need to be so careful what enters our eyes and what enters our minds. Please don't mistake my passion here for either the thought that this is easy - or the idea that I've completely mastered this battle. Unfortunately due to choices I've made in my past, this is a battle that I fight daily. But men, it is worth fighting. Our only other choice is to make ourselves a much easier target for the world - either in physical adultery - or in the mental version of the same sin. This adulteress/prostitute comes to us telling us that it is all about us. I wanted you - I sought you - I've found you. Anything that ministers to the selfish, self-centered part of us is something we should run from in life. That is especially the case when it comes to our sexuality. There is only one relationship God will bless in this way - and that is the one that we have with our wives. Remember, men, this lie is only for a moment - because, as we will learn later in this chapter of Proverbs, there is a devastating payment that will come when the sexual encounter is over. Men . . . don't buy the lie that the wicked one puts before you through the lips of the adulteress. It is just that - a lie. She will say that it is all about you - but the truth is it is only about setting the trap. Behind all this lies the wicked one, who is longing to see you, your marriage, your family, your testimony, and your relationship with God destroyed. If you cannot remember anything else - remember the cost to David for his adultery with Bathsheba. It was a one night tryst - but the cost kept being paid for the rest of his life - and on through his family for generations to come. No matter what a woman says to you in this matter, do not believe her. Hold fast to the Word of God. Run! Flee youthful lusts, but pursue righteousness, faith, love, and peace with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart. That is the biblical counsel that Paul gave to young Timothy. It should be the counsel we follow when a strange woman comes and tries to gain entrance to our lives through flattery and an appeal to our selfishness. To deliver you from the strange woman, From the adulteress who flatters with her words; Proverbs 2:16
Here we have a four verse warning against the adulterous woman. It is in the midst of a passage telling us the benefits of knowing God's Word and Wisdom. His wisdom will deliver us from this kind of sexual sin. The word deliver here means to overcome the power of another that is trying to overcome us. There is a very clear power that is manifest when sexual sin is trying to deceive us. Some call it sexual tension - but I believe that it is more clearly distinguished as sexual temptation - and it is energized by the power of the wicked one. Unless the sexual encounter is between husband and wife, we can be assured that the "tension" of which we speak is an evil tension. What we need is a greater power at work in us that can overcome the temptations and the enticements to sin. God says that wisdom and the Word will deliver us from the "strange" woman. What a great way to state what we are dealing with here. This is indeed a strange woman. She is a stranger to God's ways and to God's Word. She is an adulteress - and as such she is truly strange. How we need to train ourselves with a God-centered, Biblically-based worldview on such matters. We should look at such woman and see them as strange to us. They are strange because they choose to disobey God. They are strange because they dishonor their marriage vows. They are strange because they forget the covenant they made with God. They are strange because they promise pleasure and ecstacy, but actually only deliver death and shame. How strange it is for a woman to act in this way. Our society, in contrast, glorifies this woman. They may not come out and say that she is an adulteress, but they don't say or do anything to discourage her from flaunting her sexuality in a way that is odious to God. A woman's beauty is to be for God's glory and her husband's enjoyment. Other than that - she is not to parade her beauty around in unacceptable, immodest ways. When she does so - she is basically acting like a harlot/prostitute - and is causing numerous men to stumble into visual and heart-level adultery. We should view such women - as strange indeed. This woman lures men into adultery with her flattering words. The word for flatter here is very interesting. It speaks of words that are smooth. Flattering words are smooth and easy to the ear. When we hear them we tend to agree with them because, after all, it is nice when someone finally notices how awesome and hot we are! Such words seldom are spoken to us for our benefit. That is the danger of flattery. The words that are spoken seem like they are for our benefit, but actually they are for the benefit of the one who is offering them to us. The flattery is given to fill our ears with their words, yet their aim is to gain access to our heart. Once their flattery is effective in disabling our ability to discern and act prudently, they begin to carry out their hidden plan in our lives. Here, the adulteress is using flattery to get us to commit adultery with her. She does NOT have our best interests in mind. That is why we need to reject utterly her flattering words and depart from her presence as quickly as possible. To do otherwise is to risk grave danger to ourselves and to our marriages. A wise man will learn to hear flattery and reject it. He will also know that excessive compliments from a woman other than his wife is a set up. He needs to know that he is being hunted - and that is not something to feel flattered about. Ask any animal that has been lured into the open by deceptive measures - and then has narrowly escaped with his life when the trap is sprung. The flattery is seen afterward as extremely dangerous. Therefore a wise man learns to see the trap - clings to the Lord and to the wife of his youth. As I close today, let me encourage married couples for just a moment. It is too easy once you have lived with someone long enough to get out of the habit of complimenting and in a good way, flattering them. Your spouse wants to be complimented - and talked to in a way that makes them blush a little. Know this . . . YOU are the only one who should be doing this with your spouse. But if you do not - know that they will be more vulnerable to the flattery of others. Take the time to speak something very sweet to your wives guys - ladies, do the same to your husbands. There may be someone out their who is getting ready to set a trap for them. Make it completely ineffective by lovingly flattering your sweetheart - and do it on a regular basis. It is a wise thing to do. I was due to offer peace offerings; Today I have paid my vows. Therefore I have come out to meet you, To seek your presence earnestly, and I have found you. Proverbs 7:14-15
We are continuing in this verse with the entiement and thinking of the harlot, the adulteress, as she seeks to lure a young man into her trap of sexual immorality. This verse is fascinating because it reveals that the adulteress has a religious side to her as well. Her comment to her prey is truly interesting because it speaks of someone who has gone and done their religious duty. Let's take a look at it today and seek to gain wisdom and reject stupidity as a result. Her statement is that her peace offerings are with her. The idea here is not that she has yet to offer them, but rather that her spiritual condition is one who is at peace with God - someone who has already offered this sacrifice to the Lord - and who, as a result, has some kind of stored up religious earnings. She thinks that she has religious credit on deposit - and therefore she can withdraw it in her current actions. This is the mindset of penance rather than repentance. Penance assumes that we can pay for our sins with some kind of religious ritual - and too often is seen as a payment up to date - with the result being that we can sin some more later. Repentance is a change of mind granted by God - with the result that by grace alone our sin is forgiven. Along with repentance is both restortation and regeneration so that we are truly changed. The one who has engaged in repentance IS changed by God - whereas the one doing penance is engaged in a works mentality where they have earned something from God. The adulteress here is stating that she is paid up - and has somehow earned the right to now engage in further sin. Having done her religious work - her religious duty - she is now free to live as she pleases. This is the danger of works-minded religion - it deceives the one practicing it into thinking that after they have sinned, they can just work some more - work a little harder - and all will be well. There is no transformation involved - just another IOU paid in full to God as they continue in their self-made menagerie of religous ritual. Today she has paid her vows . . . what vows? Evidently there is a supposed promise of reformation - but there is no action toward it coming any time soon. The next verse is so telling because in it she says, "Therefore I have come out to meet you, to seek your presence earnestly." Her comment is that having done her religious duty, having made worthless and empty vows, now she is free to engage in her sexual escapades. Her religion is merely a facade to further deceive whatever willing dupe is in her sites. She's ready to roll - now that she has played her religious game for the week - or the day - or however she works to maintain the illusion of being right with God. What a convenient religion this is. The danger here is that we will be drawn into an illicit relationship thinking that we are having adultery with a good person - a religious person. The reality is that we are walking over the pit that has been covered with leaves by the one hunting us. If we buy the lie and step over the hole, we will quickly find that what we've actually stepped upon is a trap. The lie was there to lure us into a false sense of safety. The reality is that we are now caught - and in grave danger. Just one last parting comment though - because this particular practice is even among those of us who are evangelicals. We need to be extremely careful that we are engaging in repentance before God and not just a protestant form of penance. When we come to confess our sins - we don't need to stop there. Too many (myself included unfortunately) just confess their sins - but do not go into the second part of 1 John 1:9. We are all about confessing a sin that makes us feel bad, feel guilty, feel caught - but are we truly interested in God's change in our hearts? The second half of that verse says that we also ask to be "cleansed from all unrighteousness." Here is the forgotten part. We need God to not only forgive - but cleanse us of the mindset and choices that led to that sin in the first place. We need to say to God, "Get rid of every 'unright' behavior, choice, thought, reasoning, and activity." There is where we can camp out for a while and have the Lord do a thorough heart searching in us. There is where we can be protected from the very sin these two verses reveal to us. We can move from penance to repentance - and in so doing - from merely salving our conscience for a few moments to true change. And strangers will be filled with your strength And your hard-earned goods will go to the house of an alien; Proverbs 5:10
Here is an interesting and prophetic verse that deals with the aftermath of someone who pursues the immoral woman or adulteress. After stating that following this woman will guarantee that your latter years will be given to the cruel one - we read one of the ways that he will begin to wreak havoc in the adulterer's life. Strangers will be filled with your strength. This is an interesting verse because it has to do with the cost of adultery. We need to remember that under Old Testament law an adulterer would be put to death if caught having adultery. So this speaks of a more merciful sentence - possibly a financial one. But as the adulterer toils away to pay the cost of his sexual escapades, he sees that the promise of pleasure has turned into a cost that was far more than he thought it would be. Even if he is not given the death sentence, he is forced to pay and pay dearly. The second thing that happens is that your hard-earned goods will go to the house of an alien. Once again this pictures punishment financially for having sex with another man's wife. The adulterer works hard - but he does not receive any of the benefit of his labor. Instead, he has to face the fact that all his hard work is worthless - because it is going to someone else. Today, we do not have adultery laws that promise death to the one caught in adultery. But these verses are still true today. Now we have something called alimony and child support. The man who commits adultery will have to deal with the fact that his former wife may divorce him. Since sexual infidelity is the reason for it - often the courts will make the man pay for his misconduct - literally pay. They will set child support and alimony for his actions to destroy his marriage. Now, when he works hard to bring home a paycheck - he does not see it coming to him - to make him wealthier. Instead he watches as it is given to others - not himself. Many divorced men lose up to 50% of their income when this happens. Wisdom allows us to see the long term liabilities of sexual immorality and adultery. Some only hear the siren song of the adulteress - and are deaf to the sound of the waves crashing on the rocks where they soon will be destroyed. Wisdom opens our eyes to what this is going to cost us - and that price is steep indeed. Some still plunge on into the abyss and pay for it later. But my hope is that many will read these words and see that nothing good can come of an adulterous relationship. And hopefully seeing these things will wisen them up to make a good decision when they are faced with sexual temptations. Hopefully they will see the destruction down the road and avoid that exit altogether. So she seizes him and kisses him And with a brazen face she says to him:
Proverbs 7:13 Here we have the continued description of the immoral, adulterous woman. It is a description that warns us of the actions of a woman that should cause us to pause if a woman we meet acts in this way. Some, after reading today's post will probably disagree with me, saying that I am taking this too far. But the fact is that today immorality is running rampant in the church today. We might be wiser to consider steering clear of the kind of behavior that is mentioned here. The immoral woman is very forward in how she approaches men. This woman seizes this guy and kisses him. In today's society woman are encouraged to be more forward with men. They are told that to sit idlely by and wait for a man to make the move is from the Victorian era - and it does not work any longer. Those who say such things are those who also explain away the Scriptures. The Word of God states that it is good for a man not to touch a woman. In regard to the relationship between a man and a woman before they are married, when we ingore this statement, we do so to our own peril. What usually happens is that touch leads to more. When the barrier of kissing is breached, it will lead to more. The next barrier is that of making out - which often also has sexual petting that goes with it. One that barrier is breached it is only the mercy of God that keeps a couple from engaging in sexual intercourse. That is why it is so important that unmarried young ladies (or any age for that matter) refrain from becoming bold in their approach to physical contact with a man. When they do this - the man, who is stimulated much easier than her - will push the relationship beyond where she takes it. Note that Solomon states that it is with a brazen face that this woman speaks to the man whom she has seized and kissed. The word "brazen" here means that it is a face filled with pride and indicates that she has seriously stepped beyond where any godly woman would go. Her arrogance is at a very high level. When you realize that she is about to propose sexual intercourse with this young man next - you see that she is truly a godless, immoral woman. Her "forward-ness" is a warning that she is going to push this encounter all the way to sexual intercourse if she can. It indicates to the man that she is a harlot, an adulterer, an immoral woman. The warning given to the young man is serious - keep your way FAR from her. If she gets this close - you are in grave danger. Today the film and television industry just about salutes such women. They think it is great that women are grabbing life by the horns and pushing the envelope sexually. But such a thing is not to be saluted - it is reason for grieving. When the women of a society begin acting like this - the society itself is moving toward destruction. The women are a society are meant to be ones who hold it back from destruction. They are called the fairer sex. This means that they are more spiritually astute - and tend to keep the society back from actions that would harm it. But when they reach this level of degregation, things are moving fast toward a total breakdown of societal stability. I offer a word of encouragement to parents and to young women who desire God's best for themselves and for their future families. Teach your daughters how to be chaste, godly, reserved women. Help them embrace their femininity. Teach them to wait on God for their husbands - and to reserve their purity and virginity for God and His glory - and the man God brings to them to be their husband. This will require rejecting the forwardness of our society - and the push that feminism has made to make women just like men. You will find with this choice that your daughters will be far more humble. They will learn trust and reliance upon the Lord as they wait for God to bring them their husbands. Oh, and it will do one other thing. It will begin to bring our sexually crazed society back to godliness - at least as they see these young ladies. What is amazing is as they see this - they will both mock and wonder. They mock because doing so alleviates their own trashed consciences. But they will wonder because deep down within themselves they will know that this is right. There will even be a tinge of regret that they did not make the same decision. May God give us grace to train up our daughters to be such women of holiness . . . and . . . may we also teach our sons to value such ladies - and become the kind of men who can become their husbands. Or you will give your vigor to others And your years to the cruel one; Proverbs 5:9
What kind of problems come with a choice for sexual immorality and relationships with immoral men and women? This question will be answered today by our proverb of the day. This entire chapter deals primarily with the immoral person. It actually is the words of a father as he warns his son to stay away from immoral women - especially the adulteress. In verse 9 of this section the father begins to tell the son why he should stay far away from the adulteress. Here he addresses some of the things that will happen if he were to stray into her paths and be caught by her wiles. He first mentions that if he does this he will give his vigor to others. The word vigor means grandeur - and it speaks of a man's honor, glory, and majesty. A man may be a person of honor - but when he is giving himself to a sexually immoral relationship - and this is truest when he is doing it with a married woman - he loses all that honor. Too often I've watched over the years as a man pursues an adulterous relationship with a woman - and in the process he loses any standing in the community. He may have had it prior to the relationship - but not people look at him and shake their heads. Think about the shame and disgrace that came upon President Bill Clinton when his sexual scandal came out in our society. It was as if many in our nation lost all respect for Him. He gave his vigor - his glory and honor - to another. He had decided to spend the value of his name on a young woman solely for the purpose of sex. He sold himself far too cheaply - and in the eyes of many - he will never regain that glory or honor. The second warning that is offered to the son about sexual immorality is that his years will be turned over to the "cruel one." The word used here is "akzari" and it refers to something or someone who is cruel and deadly. It actually refers in its root to the venom of cobras. In Job 41:10 this same word is used to describe the fierce nature of Leviathan. We should not lose sight that all of these terms are also used to describe the person or the work of the devil as well. Thus it is not too far of a stretch to grasp that when we give ourselves over the to harlot or to the adulteress, we are giving ourselves to the work and power of the devil. He is behind these things and loves it when someone steps into his trap. Disgrace and a cruel task master . . . that is what waits in store for the young man (or any man for that matter) who makes the disastrous mistake of giving himself over to the adulteress or the harlot. Her service is terribly costly and devastating. The wise father takes the time and uses these images to teach his son what awaits him if he gives in to his sexual urges. He does so not just to scare his son (although that is certainly not an unwise thing to do) but to warn him of the reality of what awaits him on the other side of giving himself over to sexual immorality. |
Proverb a DayEach day, we'll take a look at a verse from the chapter of Proverbs for the day. Our hope is to gain wisdom each day - and from that wisdom - to have understanding to make godly decisions in the throes of everyday life. Thank you for visiting our website! Everything on this site is offered for free. If, however, you would like to make a donation to help pay for its continued presence on the internet, you can do that by clicking here. The only thing we ask is that you give first to the local church you attend. Thank you!
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