Proverbs 5:1 My son, give attention to my wisdom, Incline your ear to my understanding;
"Friends, Romans, countrymen, lend me your ears." This was the way Shakespeare began the speech of Mark Antony in Julius Caesar. It was a cry for people to listen and to pay close attention because something very important was going to be said. Proverbs has its own soliloquies as well - but they come from the mouths of mothers and fathers to their sons and daughters. This is how the father begins his speech to his son - by calling him to listen and to pay close attention to what he is going to say. Give attention, pay heed, pay attention, listen is what the father is saying to his son. But he is not calling him to attention to just anything - he is calling his attention to the wisdom that the father shares with him. Wisdom is the familiar word "chokmah" in the Hebrew meaning, which means not just seeing or knowing things from God's perspective - but having a skill and experience in using this wisdom to make moral and practical decisions. We are not to turn the education and en-wisening of our children over to others. That is what western culture has done too often. We turn our kids over to the school - even to their Sunday school teachers and youth leaders. Let them teach our children wisdom - that's what they're for right? WRONG! They are there to only add to and embellish the core teachings that should have come from us. When we do not do our jobs as parents - believe me - no one else can make up for it. The father calls his son to bend his ear close when he speaks and when he instructs. "Incline your ear" is like Shakespeare's, "Lend me your ears," comment. It is saying to the son that he needs to stretch out his ears - bend them toward what the father is saying. He is to extend and lean his ears to what is being said - but even more to that - to understand his father's words and see how they apply to all of life! We talk about how the younger generation is leaving the church. They are leaving because they see very little relevance to their lives from what is being taught. They see the Bible as stories told to them when they were little - as an antiquated book that no longer applies to today's world. Why? Because they did not hear from dad - nor see in dad a daily pursuit of the truth - as well as a daily understanding of how that truth applies to making decisions in the everyday life that he leads. Of course they are going to think it is of little value. Oh, but when a father teaches his children these things - calls them to listen and bend their ear close as he instructs them. When dad reveals to them a life lived from the perspective of God and of Scripture - that - dear brothers and sisters is a life that will call a son to follow. That child will value what he has heard and SEEN in his father. He will listen because he has SEEN how important this book - the Bible - is to how his father lives. That, my brothers is how we recapture this generation. We do so by living according to God's wisdom - then calling our sons to listen as we recount time after time when that wisdom guided us through the minefields of life. What is the particular "minefield" that the father is so intent on teaching to his son? It is the minefield of sexual immorality. He is talking to his son about women - actually about a certain kind of woman - the immoral one. He is also sharing much wisdom with his son about the battle that will ensue when he deals with women like this. He does not hide such things from his son - he teaches them honestly and very straightforwardly. This is not something that is relegated to the sex ed teacher - it is something the father teaches his son. I'm about to say some things that will probably offend some - while at the same time making others shout for joy that someone is saying them out loud. Sex education was meant to be taught at home and in the church. Never was this meant to be a topic brought up without very clear moral underpinnings. If you look at the first 9 chapters of Proverbs you will see that this issue was raised BY THE FATHER to the son several times. God intended for a godly father to teach his son about sex - and about the pitfalls of being a fallen male in this world. The Bible is not squeamish on the matter of sexuality. It faces it head on - sharing general teaching, instruction, warnings, as well as cautionary historical examples of sexuality running wild and causing great destruction. I've long held that if the whole Bible was ever to be put on film - it would carry at least an R rating. The perils of heterosexual sin, homosexuality, and perversion are not hidden from us. They are displayed in such a way that we see their destructive power and desire to avoid them. Dad, are you teaching your son these things? Have you sat down and taught him about his sexuality - with a proper moral foundation underneath so that his sexuality does not run rampant and destroy relationships and possibly even his health and welfare? Because the church has not stepped out in front on such issues - and because fathers have not taught their sons and instructed them in how to wisely deal with their sexuality - the world has taken over. The result is sexuality taught without biblical morality. How's that working for us so far? Have we brought about a safer, wiser, more responsible sexuality among our children and youth? It has been a disaster because teaching sexuality without morality has led to a sex-crazed society that has cheapened sex and made it accessible and acceptable in every situation. Dads . . . YOU are responsible for how your son and daughter views sexuality. If you do not teach them the truth - they most likely will not know it. The television and movies will not tell them about such things within a biblical context. Magazines and books won't do it either. They will promote the perversions of sex passed on by our society and those who view sex as an anything goes activity - just so long as you use protection. Fathers! Nothing will protect your child from the dangers of unbiblical sex. There is not a condom or a safety device made that protects the heart and the spirit from the devastation and destructive power of sin. May God grant us a revival among fathers - that we will call our children to listen - and we will talk to them frankly and honestly about their sexuality. May we also give them a godly, biblical framework in which to enjoy their sexuality as God intended. If we do not talk to them and teach them - I can promise you others will who have no intention of offering them the greatest protection we can have in sex - the wisdom of God.
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Proverbs 29:27 An unjust man is abominable to the righteous, And he who is upright in the way is abominable to the wicked.
The godly and the ungodly take very divergent paths. This is fairly elementary to anyone to see. But what we often do not see is that not only are these paths different - they are also disgusting to each other. The word that is used in today's proverb to describe the view that they have of each other is "abominable." The word used here is the Hebrew word "ebah" which means anything that is offensive or what is an abomination to someone else. In Scripture God uses this word to describe those who depart from His Law. Often the word is used for more grievous sins - like idolatry, child sacrifice, and homosexual behavior. What God is saying to us is that there is a radical and serious difference between those who desire to live godly and those who do not. Let's look at little further into this as we seek to understand God's wisdom for us today. The "unjust" man ("awel" in the Hebrew) is one who deviates from God's way. This kind of behavior and choice is usually set in contrast to words like righteous, upright, and justice. There is a basic injustice in the one who deviates from God's way - and God, being just, will have to bring judgment and punishment to the one who does so. This is why the unjust man is abominable to the righteous. The godly man sees that the unjust man is unjust first and foremost to God Himself - then from that infinite injustice flows all other lesser injustices to others. Since we know that the righteous man is not so because of his own works but due to God's grace, the righteous man knows the cost of this ungodly behavior. That cost is God's Son, crucified on the cross (to the Old Testament saint it was the promise of this in the sacrifices of the Law). To embrace such behavior is to treat God's gift - the sacrifice made to forgive us and remove us from under God's wrath - as worthless and empty. This is an abomination to the righteous man. The same is true of the ungodly man toward the upright. What the ungodly see is a man who is "upright in the way." This phrase communicates the path of the godly man. What the ungodly sees is a guy who is seeking to walk according to a set of rules that are different than his. He is seeking to be upright - which means to do what is good and what is right. That alone is offensive to the ungodly man. His worldview involves him deciding what is right and good. It even involves him changing his views to match his lifestyle if he desires. To have what he considers an arbitrary set of morals set by God - which is then viewed as ultimate truth is untenable to him. That would mean his own views of right and wrong are in error if they are different than those God has given. His value system cannot tolerate this - because his value system is that of the book of Judges. He does whatever is "right in his own eyes." He is a law unto himself. He does not judge anyone else (unless they judge him or get in the way of him doing what he wants to do) and he expects the same from everyone else (of course always giving way to what he wants if there is any contradiction). Thus the "way" or lifestyle of this guy who is so arrogant as to call his way "right" is an abomination to him. It offends him to the core of his being! Paul told young Timothy the following in his second letter to him, "Now you followed my teaching, conduct, purpose, faith, patience, love, perseverance, persecutions, and sufferings, such as happened to me at Antioch, at Iconium and at Lystra; what persecutions I endured, and out of them all the Lord rescued me! Indeed, all who desire to live godly in Christ Jesus will be persecuted." (2 Timothy 3:11-13) Often we focus only on the last of these three verses - that all who desire to live godly in Christ Jesus will be persecuted. This was only a conclusion for what Paul had already said in verses 11-12. In those verses he spoke of his teaching, conduct, purpose, and faith. Paul was persecuted because he chose to live in "the upright way." That way consisted of two things - both of which are vital to understanding Christianity. First is the 'way of salvation.' The upright way will never be lived out by effort and striving. Righteousness and upright living is attained by grace, not by our works. God MAKES us upright by an act of His mercy and grace. That comes through the gospel - and only through the gospel. The world finds this incredibly offensive and very narrow minded. But that is the truth. That is how God has addressed sin - and that is, according to Jesus Himself, the only way, truth, and life - the only way to the Father. The second truth of the upright way is that we live and walk it out in a paradox - we work as God works within us. We are called to obedience - and we seek God's power by which we can then walk in that obedience. We are to make choices - strong and bold choices - even as it is God who works in us to will and to do according to His good pleasure. Living a godly life involves a glorious tension in our lives. We are to do it - and He is to do it within us. We cannot think we do it on our own - and we cannot think that He will do it for us without our cooperation. The wicked find this whole scenario ridiculous and an abomination. To them it is ridiculous because there is no God - or if there is, their god agrees with them. They have a god of their own making - who looks and acts just like they do. Any other God is unacceptable. The word "wicked" here is telling. The word is "rasa" and it means to be guilty - a wrong-doer, criminal, or a transgressor. It means someone who is wrong! The reason the wicked hate the upright, and find their way abominable is because as they watch them - they know they are wrong. They do not want anyone telling them they are wrong. Their reaction to this is to fume within and rage about how judgmental the Christian is - even if the Christian is not saying anything to them. Their very lifestyle is a rebuke to them. If the Christian speaks out - then they explode - because their guilt rages within them. There will always be a radical distinction between the righteous and the wicked. There will also be a hostility to the way each other chooses to live. That is the wisdom that God is seeking to impart to us through today's proverb. Therefore the constant effort among Christians to make the gospel inoffensive is silliness. We can be gracious and kind in how we communicate the gospel - but to make it inoffensive to the wicked is impossible. There will always be the offense of the cross of Christ. There will always be the offense of God asserting that He is God and He is absolutely right on moral matters (and all others he touches upon as well). Thus the constant effort to make Christianity inoffensive in its essence is a fool's pursuit. It would be wise for us to abandon it and return to living it simply before the lost, loving them from the heart, and doing all that we can to share the message of the gospel with them. We do so not because we think we are superior. Perish that thought. We do it because we've received grace and desire for them to receive it as well. We want them to be saved - made righteous by grace - and abandon their abominable way to embrace a life lived by the grace of God unto the glory of God. The glory of young men is their strength, And the honor of old men is their gray hair. Proverbs 20:29
Today's proverb gives us some valued information about both young men and old men. This is not a proverb that compares them against each other. It gives us the best view of what is wonderful about them - and what they should strive for in their youthful zeal - as well as their older, wiser days. There are some great words used here to describe the younger man and his pursuit in the things of God - and in life in general. Note that God's wisdom tells us there is a "glory of young men." When you are younger in years you seek after the glory of something. This is not meant to be a negative statement - as if the younger man is usurping the glory of God. They just have an appetite for glory. The best way to describe this is that they yearn for rewards in life. If you place a goal with a reward that grants glory for something - young men will pursue it with great passion. These are the years when trophies, plaques, awards, and bonuses mean the most. Put a goal in front of these young men - and they will be greatly motivated to reach it. This is why the movement to make everyone equal at a young age is not good for our children. The whole, "we don't keep score" and "everyone is a winner" is not a realistic view of life. Granted we don't want competition to become an all-consuming desire to where morals and character don't seem to matter any longer - but the fact of life is that there is going to be competition. There are going to be winners and losers chosen in almost every area of life. Solomon warns that this can become vanity - when competition becomes the only thing that matters - but at the same time God's Word exhorts us to run the race "so as to win." Only one person gets the prize (or one team) but a wise parent encourages his children to excell at what they do - even if all they have to measure their success is their own previous performance. We read here that the young man's glory is his strength. Young men want to be strong in some way. Some choose physical strength - others mental prowess. Whatever way they choose, they love being seen as strong in something. There is a wisdom that takes this desire and channels it in ways that are very constructive. Encourage your young men to find something they enjoy - or an area in which they can excell. Put goals and lofty aspirations before them in this - and then encourage the daylights out of them as they strive toward it. Let me give you a small example of this. Too often we do not challenge our young men - and this is a detriment that cripples them later in life. We are so given to the fear that they will have their self-image damaged - that we do not see that it already is because as young men they are not being challenged to do great things. One summer I took the high school guys I work with and challenged them to read the New Testament once a month - and memorize 8-10 verses a week. They were to do this in June, July, and August. Some might be concerned that I was "setting them up to fail" and that their poor little self worth would be damaged as a result. But that was not the case. They rose to the task with youthful vigor and strength! They loved it - and as a result were blown away at what God did in their hearts as they strove for something challenging. They each felt their strength as they were challenged to do something that was a huge challenge. They would come in week by week having met the challenge - or needing to step up and do what needed to be done to meet it. These young men gloried in the strength to do something hard for God. What about old men? What is it that motivates and moves them. Note first that the word glory is removed and the word honor is inserted. Older men desire honor - but once again let me state that they do not desire God's honor in an ungodly way. Their desire is for others to realize that they have lived a godly, honorable life - and due to this should be respected and honored for their years of labor and wisdom. The proverb says that older men are honored due to their grey hair. Grey hair is achieved by . . . getting older It means that you've lived for a while. We joke that grey hair comes because of walking through the difficulties and challenges of life. That may not be as much of a joke as we think. Grey hair means you are no longer a young man plowing through life's difficulties. It means you've walked through them - and honestly - know ways that are wiser and better. Grey hair comes with battle scars and with proven character in the difficult trials that life throws your way. Grey hair means you've been around for a while - you've been knocked down a lot - but it also means that you've gotten back up and continued in the way a little better and a little wiser. There is a phrase older men know - you learn to work smarter, not just harder. This comes from wisdom - and it is a reason to be honored. Honor comes when people listen to you. They listen, not because you love to talk and because you have a thousand stories you repeat again and again. They listen because you are wise and becasue you truly have something to say. They listen because you not only know the road - but you know the good short-cuts. You know the the short-cuts that work - and those that will result in disasters. You also know that some things are only learned over time - and that there are no short-cuts to them. They also listen because you've walked with God for years - have survived the pitfalls and ambushes of life - and have come out a godly man. There is a lack of wisdom that unwisely pits younger men against older men. It devalues one or the other while trying to make the case that one is more important than the other. The truth - and wisdom tells us that both are needed. The military needs strong young men who can fight - yet it also relies on older, seasoned men to strategize the best ways to fight and defend the land. Business needs young, strong men who can work hard and cover a lot of things - yet it also relies on older, wiser men to navigate the dangerous paths that can often destroy a business. Both are needed - if they understand their roles and don't succumb to jealousy. Blessed is the business, organization, and nation who grasps this - who values the strength of young men and the grey hair of older ones. They will receive the best of both ends of the age spectrum - and will prepare the next generation of older men to do the same. The fact is this - the younger men of today are becoming the older men of tomorrow. Oh that we will learn to value the contributions of both - and will find ourselves continuously training the next group of older men who will lead and appreciate the younger. So you will walk in the way of good men And keep to the paths of the righteous. Proverbs 2:20
There is a road map that God has for us - not just for a short journey, but for an entire lifetime. The proverb for today speaks of this in two ways. There are two words used here to indicate a way or a path. One refers to the way of good men - while the other speaks of the paths of the righteous. Let's take a look at both of them and see how we can gain a little bit of wisdom from them both. First we learn of the way of good men. This is the Hebrew word "derek" which speaks of a way that is traveled. The way that this word is used most often is to speak metaphorically of the pathway of one's life. This suggests to us a pattern of life - which is referred to in Deuteronomy 8:6 as an obedient life and in 2 Samuel 22:22 and Jeremiah 5:4 refers to a life lived for godly and righteous ways. Since the entire chapter focuses on the power of the Word of God in our lives - and our need to know it, study it, meditate on it, and apply it to our lives - then we can see that if we take the Word seriously - it will have a powerful affect on our lives. The biblical way is the way of good men. Those who have a sincere desire to obey the Lord and to serve Him and love Him will live good lives. Their lifestyles are worth emulating - and we can follow their way of life if we are committed to following the Scriptures. Second, we learn of the paths of the righteous. The word for "paths" here is the Hebrew word, "orah." This word is similar to our first. It speaks of a way or a highway. It is metaphorically used to speak of the literal path upon which someone walks - but also can refer to the course of their life - the characteristics of their lifestyle. These can be good or evil, righteous or deserving of judgment. Here since it speaks of the paths of the righteous, we are speaking of a good way to go. The difference between these two words seems to be that in the first, we are walking in the ways of the good men we see. It seems to have an immediacy to it - as if we have these men before our eyes. It speaks of following the examples of men who are alive and whom we seek to emulate because of their godly lifestyles. The second word speaks more of holding fast to the very way (lifestyle over their entire lives) of righteous men. Where do we learn of such men? First we learn of them in the Scriptures. We know of godly men throughout the Word of God. These are men who have an example and a lifestyle worthy of following. These are men like Moses, David, Elijah, Elisha, Hezekiah, the prophets and others in the Old Testament. In the New we have Peter, Paul, John, and Jesus. We need to look at both their daily lives - as well as the course of their lives and give ourselves to following their example. Do you have such men in your sights? Are you making sure that you and your children have the right kind of heros to emulate and to follow? We desperately need to change the kind of men we set before ourselves and our children in this generation. If we allow the media and the world to chose these men we will see thier bankruptcy poured into the lives of our children - as well as polluting our own hearts as to what a real man should be. Men like Jim Elliot, William Carey, John Patton, George Mueller, John Hyde, C. S. Lewis, Vanya, and Bruchko should be well known to this generation of the church. Unfortunately, they are relatively unknown and we are much poorer for it. May God give us a renaisance of Christian heros and men worthy of following before our eyes. May their example help to point the way and the path upon which we should be walking. Be wise, my son, and make my heart glad, That I may reply to him who reproaches me. Proverbs 27:11
When we have wise sons it is a joy to our hearts as fathers. That is why it is so vital that the current generation of fathers take on the task of rearing a generation of sons who reject this present evil world and its ways and choose instead to live according to the wisdom God offers to us in the Scriptures. What I think we have here is the frustrated cry of a father. He is frustrated because he desires for his son to be wise - yet, he is facing criticism and reproach because he is not. It may be the cry of a father who has seen men before him - godly men in their own right - and yet they were subject to reproach because of the character and choices of their sons after them. The father may have been a man of God - a man of great godly character and actions. He may have been a leader - an example himself. The problem is that his son does not walk in the same way. Think about Samuel the prophet for a moment in this light. He was a man of God - unparalleled in how he served God with all his heart. Yet the one thing that caused the downfall of his ministry - was the way that his sons lived. At the close of his life the people of Israel asked for a king. They asked, not because Samuel was inadequate as a prophet. They asked because by their own admission, Samuel's sons did not walk in his ways. Samuel, as godly as he was - had not learned the lesson of Eli's lack of godly fathering of his sons. Eli's sons were ungodly - and their actions led to the people not being led by godly men. Now, Samuel, after seeing God bring Israel back to Himself - now watched as they rejected the Lord as king over them - because they would have to trust Samuel's sons to lead them after Samuel's death. This they did not want - because Samuel's sons were not men of God. The cry of a godly father who is reproached when his sons do not walk in his ways - is that they would be wise and godly. But as we look back on much of biblical history - it is one littered with godly men whose very sons did not follow in their daddy's footsteps. So what are we to learn here from this passage about wisdom? Fathers, please hear me for a few moments here. You may have a legacy in your own actions that blows everyone away - but it will mean little to you later in life if your sons do not walk in your ways. God calls us as fathers to love our children by rearing them to walk with Him. That is a task that we cannot ignore - no matter how successful we are. It will come to haunt us - as it did Samuel, as it did Solomon, as it did Hezekiah. These men were all godly in their own right - but their sons did not walk in their ways. In all three cases, the legacy of these men was not carried on through their sons. They turned from following the Lord and the result was pretty disastrous for them - and for the people whom they were supposed to lead. Wisdom is found in a father who leads and teaches his son to walk wisely. He does so as one of the most important things he can possibly do in life. The detriment to our society and the church within it cannot be possibly be calculated because our sons often do not walk in our ways. Men leave carnage behind them when they do not walk with God. God wants men to lead in spiritual matters - but when they don't - or sadly can't - what they leave behind is much reason for us to reproach their fathers for not making as an ultimate priority the responsibility to bring up godly sons after them. My son, if your heart is wise, My own heart also will be glad; and my inmost being will rejoice When your lips speak what is right. Proverbs 23:15-16
What should matter most to us when we think of our sons? I know for a period of my life what mattered most to me was seeing my sons excel at sports. I could have sadly rewritten these two verses with the following foolish edits. "My son, if you do well at football and soccer, my own heart also will be glad; and my flesh will rejoice when I can cheer at your games for your goals and touchdowns." (Dopey Father 23:15-16) First of all I want to state that I am not against sports or competitive activities. When God graciously broke me he still allowed my sons to compete in sports - and I continued to cheer for them on the sidelines. Oh, but how I grieved for the years that I had lost - and for the way I had skewed their minds on what was a priority in their lives. During that time period we set everything aside for their sports careers. We spent tremendous amounts of money following them all over the mid-south (which, by the way, put us into debt). I had my sweet wife miss church along with my sons, so that we could go wherever the coach told us to go. We basically had a very clear idol in our lives - and it is was the dream I had that maybe one day my sons could play college ball - or even make a pro team. But the most devastating problem that was growing all the time was the misplaced priorities that I was putting before my sons. My own lack of submission to the Lordship of Jesus Christ in my life - carried over into my son's lives. This story ends well - because of two things. First and foremost because of God's mercy and grace. But secondly, because of some serious repentance on my part - repentance and brokenness that led me back to a proper life under the Lordship of Jesus Christ - and with proper biblical priorities. Let me get back, though, to the proverb at hand. The father here is speaking of what makes his heart glad. The father here was glad, and later even rejoiced that his son had a wise heart. Wisdom was what this father valued most in his son. And it is a wisdom that sees life as God sees it. The father here lived to see his son one day with a very wise and discerning heart. He labored to see that one day his boy would be a man who longed to do the will of God above anything else in his life. This places before us a very important question. Are we as fathers seeing our most important job as laboring to see our sons become wise, godly young men? Wisdom comes from God. We learned this back in Proverbs 2. If we are going to have wise sons, it will be because we have taught them the things of God. Wise sons come from wise fathers who both know the Word and apply it in our everyday lives. The passion that often drives a "sports-dad" will be re-directed into being a "godly-dad." If the Christian fathers who spend hours trying to hone their son into the next Peyton Manning or the next Landon Donovan, would devote that much time to honing their sons into the next Paul - we'd watch a revolution in the church - and in our society in general. Instead of working on passing and catching skills alone - we'd find ourselves spending time also reading the Word with our child. We'd be working on wisdom skills - on memorizing Scripture - and on being able to take the Word of God an use it to properly discern good and evil as they walked through their lives. I know I may be laboring the point a little bit, but think about this for a moment. How many sons are actually going to be playing sports at the college level? How many truly have a shot at the NFL or MLB or the MLS? And how many who make it to those levels of sport will have a wise and discerning heart there to keep them out of the trouble that seems to be following sportsmen in these sports? The truth is very few will make it to these teams, but everyone single one of those young men will need to be able to live a life of wisdom. All of them - even those who do make it - will need "wisdom skills" to walk through life worthy of their calling in Jesus Christ. If you think your son will make it to a college or pro level - have at it. But Dad, make sure that the most important goal you have for your son is to live a life of wisdom an godliness! Make sure HE knows that this is the true goal - and that which would most delight your heart and soul! The father her also states that his inmost being will rejoice when he hears his son speaking what is right. The inmost being spoken of here is literally kidneys in the Hebrew. Dads, your kidneys need to rejoice over your son! Now there is a phrase you don't hear much anymore. "Hey Bob, man my kidneys just rejoice over how Bob Jr. is growing into a godly young man!" The kidneys were thought, along with the heart, to be the deepest seat of emotion and joy in a person. It referred to the innermost and most private part of a person's life. When you are moved to rejoice at that level, you are rejoicing at the deepest level possible. You rejoice because your heart is blessed at the core level of your beliefs and principles. This leaves me with another loaded question. What is your deepest rejoicing about in life? If you find yourself rejoicing deeply at the touchdowns and sports achievements of others - but yawning at the things of God - the exhibition of godly character and true manhood - you are rejoicing about the wrong things. Let me say, I love a good touchdown like most guys - but God has worked to where I get more excited when I watch my sons make godly decisions. The reason this father was rejoicing in his kidneys was because his son was speaking what is right. This is not that his son was parroting some phrase or some rote speech he knew would make dad happy, but that his son was speaking normally - and was saying what was right. This is an important step for our sons maturity wise. Jesus taught us that it was out of the abundance of the heart that the mouth spoke. So when we hear our sons speaking what is right in their normal conversation - it tells us that God has worked in their hearts. It is easy to get a son to say what YOU want him too when he is around you - but it is far more difficult to rear him to say the right thing (the godly thing) as a matter of normal living. This requires God working in his heart. That is why the father was dancing in his kidneys when he knew his son was speaking this way. Fathers, this proverb is vital for us to grasp. We are called to take boys given to us by God, and rear them to be men. This requires doing far more than just bringing home the bacon - and re-living our desires for sports grandeur through them. Taking a boy and making him a man requires that we put wisdom and godliness at the top of our own priority list, and helping our sons to do the same. It means laboring to see a heart-change in our boys by the working of the gospel and the Spirit of God. It means training our sons to love a woman properly - and to have a vision of what God desires for their lives to be. But I will tell you by the mercies of God that when you watch your sons begin to make godly decisions - no sports achievement in the world can come close to the sensation you will get in your kidneys! Live therefore for the glory of God and the blessing of your kidneys as you labor to take boys - and give the world men of God. Like a bird that wanders from her nest, So is a man who wanders from his home. Proverbs 27:8
Birds begin every spring by gathering what is needed to construct a nest. Usually they select a place that they believe will give them protection and shelter. This becomes the location where they then lay eggs and work to build a family. The nest serves as the location of safety and of security. For a bird to leave the nest is dangerous. Note that the term used for this leaving is the word wander. The bird is not flying from the nest for the purpose of hunting or finding food for itself and its young. This bird is just following its own curiosity wandering away from the nest to see what he can see. This indicates that we are probably speaking of the young - because an adult bird knows better than to wander from the nest. There is a word for birds who wander from their nests - prey! They become prey for those who are watching to see if they leave the protection and cover of the nest. They are sitting ducks as they go out from the nest just wandering wherever they go. It is a very dangerous thing to just go wandering away. The picture of a bird wandering from its nest is compared to a man who wanders from his home. Here again is God's wisdom. God establishes the home as the central unit of society. It is also the place where God intends for children to be reared to maturity. There God provides for the child two loving parents who are focused on selflessly giving themselves for this child's good. As long as the child stays within the home (meaning its influence and protection) that child is safe. When the child wanders from that place - he is in danger. But what we have said to us here is not about a child - it is about a man. The man who wanders from his home is like the bird wandering from his nest. What would cause a man to wander from his home? There are many things actually that work toward guiding a man toward this disaster. First is another woman. Many men wander from their home and wind up being involved with a woman who is not their wife. They wander away from their commitment - away from their vows to God and to their bride - and much like the bird wandering from his nest - this man is caught . . . trapped . . . hunted and captured. Sexual immorality and adultery are both strong traps that have destroyed many a man who wandered from the nest of his home and marriage. Another thing that causes men to wander is outside interests that begin to dominate their lives. Please understand I'm not against a man having outside interests like hunting, fishing, sports, cars, motorcyles, or whatever else a guy chooses to pursue. What I warn men against is having pursuits that take them away from the home far too often. Our commitment as a husband and father is to our wives and our children. Anything that takes us away from them - and hinders us from being there for them as we should - is not good. It is another way men "wander" from the nest - and leave themselves (and their families) unprotected. There is more to this than just the damage done to the man who wanders away. When he is in this "wandering" state, his family is left unprotected. His sons are untaught in the things of the Lord - and undirected into God's way by watching and participating with their father in vastly important ways. His daughters are left unprotected - and grow up with a sense that they have to take care of themselves. They face dealing with boys on their own - and since dad has been off acting like a boy - they don't know what a real man looks like. Too often this leads to disaster as sons grow up being boys perennially as they follow the footsteps of a father who leads them there by not growing up himself. Daughters grow up unprotected and wind up going out with and marrying the wrong kind of man. There are truly multiple disasters that come from a man wandering from his home. Men . . . God wants you to be MEN! That means leaving behind boyhood and choosing to be the man God wants you to be in your home. The church and our world desperately needs men like this. We need guys who choose to die to themselves and see more and more as they grow older that life is not about them. They grow up and realize that shirking serious responsibilities in the home and in the church is creating a horrific society and a broken nation. We cannot continue on the course we are on - because to do so is to embrace destruction on a national scale. I realize that this is not just a problem for us - it has been a multi-generational problem in our nation. Many of us are like we are - because we have had fathers who wandered from the home - either physically, emotionally, spiritually, or all the above. But we cannot continue on this path - it surely leads to disaster! May God move in our hearts and in our homes to fulfill His promise in Malachi 4:5-6. There the Lord spoke of a day when he would send us "Elijah the prophet" before the great and terrible day of the LORD. His purpose and ministry would be to, ". . . restore the hearts of the fathers to their children and the hearts of the children to their fathers . . ." God's promise here was so that He would not have to come and smite the land with a curse. I think we see all the marks of that curse on our land today. To be honest, the vast majority of the responsibility for that curse lies on the fathers of today and yesterday - for wandering from home. May the work of revival and reformation bring fathers back home - first back to the Lord Himself, then back to their wives and children. Basically - back to the nest - a place they never should have wandered from in the first place. The memory of the righteous is blessed, But the name of the wicked will rot. Proverbs 10:7
What kind of memories come to mind when you hear the following names. Take a moment and remember Billy Graham. Now take a moment and remember Adolf Hitler. That brief exercise has just proven the proverb that we will examine today. Proverbs tells us that the memory of the righteous is blessed. God is not saying that the righteous will have a great memory - but rather when people remember the righteous they will do so with a smile on their face and good things in their heart. Godly people not only die well - they also are remembered well. Billy Graham is nearing the day when he will go to be with the Lord. I can promise you that on the day our brother goes to be with Jesus, the memory of who he is and what he has done in the Lord will be a blessing to millions. I remember a scene from the movie, "Chariots of Fire." It was at the very close of the movie. Two men are remembered for the lives that they lived. The first was Harold Abrahams, a sprinter who won a gold medal in the 1924 Olympics. He was a determined man who lived for that medal. When he died some rememebered him as a great sprinter - but Abrahams was not known for his graciousness or great soul. The second man was Eric Liddell, a scotsman, who won gold in the 400, a race many thought he would compete in poorly. Liddell was supposed to be in the 100, but chose not to compete as it would make him do so on a Sunday, something that was against his own religious convictions. After the Olympics Liddell went to China as a missionary where he was dearly loved by the Chinese during his ministry there. The movie spoke of the day Liddell died with these words, "All Scotland mourned." When that godly man went to be with the Lord - all of Scotland mourned his death - and remembered his life with great joy. The memory of the righteous is blessed! That is the case with men like Liddell - but it is also the case with much lesser known men. Being a pastor, I've watched it again and again at funerals. My third funeral, after I did two for lost people, was for a precious 90+ year old woman who loved the Lord with all her heart. She never raced in the Olympics or went to China as a missionary. She just lived in a small Arkansas community and loved Jesus and those around her all her life. When she died it was such a precious thing to hear from all those who knew her. They spoke glowingly of her commitment to Christ and the way that she lived for God's glory as she gave herself to those around her. Indeed her memory was blessed that day - and many afterward. But let us turn to Mr. Hitler. Just that name causes people to cringe. Over the years - the rot of that name continues to cast a putrid shadow over history. Adolf Hitler's name will rot throughout all time. He was a wicked man who lived for his own power and conquest. After World War II we learned of his horrific efforts to exterminate an entire race of people. There are few if any who have any kind thoughts toward this man - and those who do usually share his twisted philosophy of a master race. His name will live in infamy and shame for what he did. So, what kind of memory will you create when your days are done? Will you live for righteousness and godliness? Will you live for Christ and His kingdom with a selfless, self-emptying passion that drives you to bless all those around you? Or will you give yourself to more selfish and self-centered pursuits. Will you embrace wickedness instead of righteousness. What you choose in life will determine how you will be remembered in death. Choose life - choose godliness - choose the path of the righteous that is like the light of dawn, shining brighter till the noon day. If you do this you will leave a memory that will delight the hearts of those who think of you and your works - even long after you have left this life for life eternal. A righteous man hates falsehood, But a wicked man acts disgustingly and shamefully. Proverbs 13:5
Here is a great commentary on how a righteous man will live his life. It is also a good reminder for us who desire to live godly in Christ Jesus as to what we should hate and what we should avoid in life. The righteous man hates falsehood. There it is as simply as we can possibly understand it. Want to live a righteous life? Then learn to hate what is false! But the natural question arises, "But what is false?" This is where things get interesting for us in our post-modern society. Our world tells us that truth is in the eye of the beholder. A little more simply put - truth is whatever is true to you. You can follow this particular definition of truth right into the swamps of moral decay and confusion. This ultimately leads you to believe that truth is whatever YOU want it to be - until you are arrested or shot! For this proverb to have any meaning at all, there has to be truth - ultimate truth. Once again, fortunately for those who turn to the revelation of God - there is absolute truth. The Word of God is truth. We can turn to it to get out of our moral morrass of our culture and onto solid ground once again. This may not be easy because moral truth requires moral choices - and the ability to designate things as moral or immoral. (I can hear the cries of judgmentlism and unfairness even as I write this.) God determines truth in His Word and calls us to a moral standard equal to that which He reveals. If we have problems with this - take it up with Him - or rebel against Him (which is usually the action of choice in our world today) Try a moral overthrow, but it will only lead to your life being crushed upon the rocks of God's moral laws. This means that the righteous man lives according to God's standards of right and wrong. Contrary to popular opinion (popular among fallen men - God hasn't changed His mind on these issues - and never will) - God's moral views are not hard to grasp. He gave us 10 commandments and a large amount of other material that will help us form a moral worldview that is fairly easy to grasp. The righteous man therefore considers this to be truth - and lives by it. The problem for the righteous man is that in this fallen world people will militate against God's moral law. We have a world that embraces sexual immorality - both heterosexual and homosexual - that embraces abortion and moral ineptitude. We have a world that considers ethics to be completely situational in orientation. We have a world that says we must morph to our times and to the moral climate in which we live. God says differently. The righteous man hates the lies that distort God's clear moral teachings and ethical standards. He will hate them and stand with the truth of God no matter the cost. The wicked man, though, stinks - and stinks in a shameful manner. That is what the Hebrew says very descriptively here. The shameful man acts disgustingly. The phrase here literally means that he creates a bad, stinky odor! We use the phrase, "That really stinks!" to refer to something we don't like. But for the wicked man - his lifestyle stinks to God - and frankly - to anyone who desires to please God. His lifestyle reeks of selfishness and godlessness. It reeks of self-interest and self-centeredness. The words used here spoke of roten food and the horrific odor that they gave off to others. An ungodly lifestyle stinks with this odor - but it is spiritual in nature. The wicked man embraces death in his actions. Man is dead spiritually until he comes to Christ. The wicked revel in that death - and smell like it as well. The wicked man also acts shamefully. The word use here is "chapher" which means to be ashamed and disgraced. It speaks of one who is humiliated and embarassed. The key to graspoing this word is that it refers to how a person reacts in the presence of God. In the end - we won't be judged by a jury of our peers - for they might approve of how we've lived our lives. We will face judgment at the thron of God. He is the One who will determine our future. If you can imagine the sense of infinite shame that the wicked will know at the throne of God - then you are beginning to get the picture of what we speak of here. The wicked man gives no thought whatsoever to the fact that all of his actions will be judged by a holy God. He just plows on in his wicked course until he is interrupted by his death. Suddenly, all at once, he finds himself before a holy God whose law he has broken. Things that he considered just fine become the source of unb ounded shame and disgrace to him. He is overwhelmed by his guilt, humiliation and horror over what he thought was just fine. Suddenly what was acceptable to him is so no longer. He hangs his head in shame - but it is too late for that shame to do him any good whatever. The righteous man hates lies - because it is lies that deceive men into living their lives without any thought to the judgment of God. But the righteous man knows of this judgment. If he is wise the righteous man knows that his only righteousness comes through the gift of God's grace in Jesus Christ. He receives the righteousness of Christ by faith - and now lives to honor and glorify God. That is why he also turns away from what God describes to him as sintky and shameful conduct. He does not measure all things by himself and his desires - but rather by what God reveals to him to be morally true and right. For I give you sound teaching; Do not abandon my instruction. Proverbs 4:2
Here is another call for fathers to be the spiritual leaders of their homes - and the primary Bible teacher in their children's lives. The father here is speaking to his sons. Here is something we desperately need to recover in our day - that spiritual mentoring of sons by their fathers. I work with men every week - and I see in their eyes the pain they feel because this did not happen in their lives. There is something missing in the "man's experience" when he is not mentored by his father. We find in so-called primitive cultures that the fathers train their sons and bring them through a "coming-of-age" ritual. These boys know then they have left the world of youth and moved into their roles as adults - as men. For the most part our boys have no idea when this happens - and as a result we have a plethora of 20-60 year old boys running around in our world making tremendous messes of their lives - and the lives of their wives and children. The father her says to his son these amazing words, "For I give you sound teaching." The church today - if sound teaching is offered at all - is considered responsible to teach our children and our youth the things of God. These things are needed, but they are only to be suplemental to what is happening in the home. If our children do not hear these things from their fathers - what the church does will not replace it. We need to grasp that our children are most likely to become - not what we want them to be - but what we actually are. If the father does not teach his sons the things of God - no youth pastor will ever completely fill that role. Most likely the boys growing up in that home will mirror his level of commitment to the things of God. This is why it is imperative that fathers take their roles with their sons very seriously. The father offers to his sons sound teaching in the Word. For the father who does this for his sons - they have an inheritance that goes far beyond silver and gold. They have a foundation that will stand the test of time - and if they follow their father's example - they will wind up blessing multiple generations of their family. For a society that does this - there is a sound foundation that will bless for years to come. Our founding fathers took such a role very seriously - with their own families - and with our nation as a whole. Look at the blessings that have come even into our day because of their faithfulness. The father also instructs and commands his sons not to abandon his teaching - literally, his law. Here is another biblical principle that we need to recapture. College professors and liberals today infect our children with the thought that it is the height of ignorance to simply believe what their parents taught them - especially when it has to do with religious beliefs. They save their greatest vitriol for Christianity and belief in God. The result of swimming in such moral and educational bilge water is that our children too often abandon their faith during these years and walk in ways that they regret for years to come. Oh dads, your role is far greater than you could ever imagine! YOU are responsible for giving your sons "sound teaching." The King James calls this "good doctrine" and this is so very accurate. Take your role seriously fathers! Make time in your life to know good doctrine yourself. Even if your father did not take this task seriously - you start something wonderful in the future generations of your family. Spend time with your sons and daugthers teaching them the things of God. Implant within them good, sound doctrine from the Scriptures - as well as an example your children want to follow long after they leave your home. We live in a day where the "Tea Party Movement" is seeking to restore the nation our forefathers gave to us. They do so pointing to the Constitution and the restoration of limited government. Being a patriot as well as one who believes strongly in our form of government and freedom - I applaud these efforts. But, they will ultimately fail if our nation is not also restored to her former religious - and by that I mean Christian - heritage. We cannot be governed by the United States Constitution alone. Our forefathers realized that first and foremost they were governed by the Law of God in their hearts. They spoke of how limited government could exist because the 10 commandments initially governed the human heart - and limited wickedness in society. Without this "inner-law" governing the hearts of Americans and their leaders - no external law can reign in society - without it being adversely affected by the inner wickedness of the fallen human heart. This is where government will never be able to fill the void of godly fathers. Without dads teaching their sons the things of God - at least teaching and modeling for them a life governed by the commandments of God - society will inevitable fall apart. Without dads who teach their sons and daughters the gospel of Jesus Christ. Without their hearts being transformed so that Law is written on their hearts - evil will gain ascendency in our individual lives - in our corporate structures - and in our governing bodies. What I would love to see is that the Tea Parties not just speak to the abandonment of the Constitution - but also speak to the abandonment of our children by their fathers. When I say this - I am not speaking of the fathers who physically abandon their children - although I see this as part and parcel of our spiritual decline. I speak of how the fathers of the United States have abandoned their children spiritually - expecting government and the church to fill a role God never intended them to take. Only a revival of godly fathers fulfilling their roles in their families will truly turn the next generation around in our land. May the Lord have mercy on us - and bring about a revival of fatherly proportions. |
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