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The Ministry of Neglect -, part 3 - Spouse and Family

10/14/2012

Know well the condition of your flocks, and pay attention to your herds; for riches are not forever, nor does a crown endure to all generations. Proverbs 27:23-24

We are on day three of our look at the Ministry of Neglect - and how to avoid it. Today, we will look at knowing well the condition of our families. This area is one where we are truly dealing with a "flock" God holds us accountable to lead and love. The commands to love our wives and to rear our children in the fear and admonition of The Lord are pretty clear. Yet in the midst of everything that is going on in our lives, it is too easy to not pay attention to these precious people God gives to us.

Note the second half of this verse. Riches are not forever - nor does a crown endure to all generations. There are riches in every area of which we speak. For the family, these riches are the people themselves. These riches are the relationships we have with our spouses and with our children. My relationship with my wife grows a day shorter every day that we live. If I am not careful I will spend a lifetime with a woman I hardly know. Too many marriages wind up being two people who are strangers living in the same home. Do you know your wife? Do you love her? Are you spending time with her - leading her spiritually and loving her in concrete ways? We can get so busy with work - with school - with sports - with life itself that we realize that we've not spent time just being with, talking to, and loving our spouses.

Now consider your children. Here is where we see not only the riches of knowing and being with them, but also the part of this proverb that says how the crown will not endure. If you are a dad or mom, you have a crown in your family. You are to rear your children for Christ. As your children grow up - they want to be with you and learn from you. But remember, the crown will not endure forever. They will grow up and eventually have a mind of their own. They will quickly grow to where they have their own goals, their own spouse, their own family. The crown you have will be passed to your children. Lead and love while you can. Know the condition of their hearts. Know where they are spiritually. Know what they need. Honestly . . . just know them! There will be stressful and hard times - but learn to enjoy your children.

The Ministry of Neglect is unfortunately rampant in our society when it comes to marriage and family. The world says to us that our value and meaning is attained by success in our work. We are successful because of what we do. This leads to neglected marriages and neglected children. Over generations this can be multiplied again and again to where an entire society is damaged. The wisdom of knowing the condition of your spouse - of your marriage - and of your family is worth the time it takes to gain it. It will help us grow spiritually - and it will prevent many problems. May God give us grace to walk in true understanding of the little flock God grants to us - in our homes.

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In a Hurry . . . to Make Mistakes - Proverbs 19:2

11/19/2009

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Also it is not good for a person to be without knowledge, And he who hurries his footsteps errs. Proverbs 19:2

Ever make a hurried decision - one that you did not take the time to think through carefully? Ever start out in a direction - but you did not take the time to seek God - seek counsel from godly men and women?

Yep . . . me too . . . and the results were not very pleasant at all. That is exactly what this proverb tells us. It is not good (the word here means agreeable, pleasant, or beautiful) for us to be without knowledge. Making a hasty decision will usually result in a wrong direction - and a painful conclusion to a situation. We take off with great expectations only to arrive with our hopes crushed by the problems we should have seen before we left.

The word knowledge is very telling here. It means to know - but has the idea of discernment. This is the wisdom of looking into a decision and seeing ahead what it will lead to in the end. It is knowledge and learning that results in discernment, insight, even notions concerning where we are going. One way this was described was as a kind of foreknowledge. You know that a decision is going to cause problems - thus you avoid it. Kind of like the child knowing that if he smarts off to his mother, good things are not going to happen.

Granted, we all don't have the time to submit every decision we make to a biblical think-tank so that we can avoid the bad ones. But . . . we can seek the Lord - spend time daily in His Word - learn His ways and His thoughts from what is written - and decide to follow the instruction and leading of the Holy Spirit in every situation. When we're not sure of a choice - we can talk with a godly man or woman to get advice. Here's a place where texting could be a good thing! It's also a place where young people could choose to value the perspective of someone older and wiser.

Our other option is to hurry our footsteps. The word for hurry here means to be pressed and hasty in what we do. Just a personal anecdote here may help. The vast majority of decisions where I was pressured to do something have turned out badly - some very badly. Through too many train-wrecks I've learned that when a salesman tells me - you have to make a decision NOW - the best thing I can do is walk away - pray - and come back another day. It is fascinating how often that very deal - or even a better one was available the NEXT DAY. It is also interesting how often walking away led me to realize I really didn't need what they said I absolutely had to have NOW! Absolutely for NOW . . . I need water, air . . . um . . . that's about all.

He who hurries his footsteps - who bows to the pressure to get it now - to do it now - ERRS. Errs is the word "hetah" and it means to miss the mark - to do wrong - to sin. Oh how the hurried step is too often the sinful step. The thoughtful step - is the wise one.

I heard a great statement once that has greatly affected me over the years. It goes like this. "When you see a group of sheep being driven from behind - that's the butcher taking them for slaughter. When you see a group of sheep with someone leading them from the front - that's the shepherd leading them to pasture." So, just who is it that is driving you to make that decision now - urging you to just act - don't take time to think - to look at the consequences - to consider the end of the matter? Does he have your best interests in mind? I doubt it. The One who has your best interests in mind is the Shepherd - oh, by the way, He's known as the Good Shepherd. Learn to FOLLOW Him - for His desire is to lead you - not drive you. He'll teach you and show you knowledge that will lead to footsteps that don't err. His direction leads you in the paths of righteousness - to a desired end - to a place where you won't here "Real Dumb." When Jesus leads you, you will hear - WELL DONE!

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The Ministry of Neglect -, part 3 - Spouse and Family

In a Hurry . . . to Make Mistakes - Proverbs 19:2

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